


Bittersweet

by RedRiott



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Sburb Session, Angst (Kind of), Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Drugs, Established Relationship, Eventual Smut, Jane is kind of depressed in this, Multi, Polyamory, Pt/Br Translation, Threesome - F/M/M, english is not author first language, eventual poly - Freeform, minor solroxy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-12
Updated: 2018-11-28
Packaged: 2019-03-17 03:24:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 29,877
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13650438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedRiott/pseuds/RedRiott
Summary: Jane finds the strength to leave those feelings behind, but is this what Dirk and Jake really want?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hya! Before you proceed, english is NOT my first language. So I'm pretty sure there is quite a few grammar mistakes here. If you are sensible about this kind of thing maybe you should not read this fic :c
> 
> Here is the pt-br version. I guarantee it’s much better written, hehe.  
> https://www.spiritfanfiction.com/historia/agridoce-12045260

"OMG Jane, are you even paying attention?"

"Hm?"

"Wow, I was talking about my problems with that asshole.” Jane gives her a confused look. “My boss?"

"Roxy, why don't you and he get a room already?” Jane presses the bridge of her nose with her fingers. “Everyone knows you have that black crush thingy on this guy."

"..." Roxy stays silent for a while, trying to maintain a poker face, which soon breaks into a goofy smile. "You know I can't resist a dork, hohoho." She mimics Jane's laughter, which only makes her crankier.

Then her smile drops. "I know this is a subject you don't like to talk about, but are you sure you want to meet with _them_ tonight?"

"Yes. I'm fine, really. I'm sorry I am being such a asshole to you. I just have so much on my mind recently."

_Yeah, ‘recently’._

"You are not being an asshole, you just spoke the truth.” She pauses for a bit, not really knowing how bring this topic to Jane. “You know you can talk to me, right?" Roxy looks at her with pity and Jane feels like an ass for throwing her frustrations at her best friend. Roxy always knew that touching the topic of Jane's love interest was bad. Well, it would be really nice for Jane to talk about the main cause of her anguish, however Jane firmly believed that as long as the subject was not discussed, everything would be all right and she would eventually forget Jake. _Oh, how wrong she was._

The truth is Jane’s in love with Jake as long as she remembered, since they were just kids, since the two of them started talking to each other. It hurt to love Jake, not because he obviously didn't love her back, or him being so dense about her feelings. It hurt because Jane knew she was the one to blame, after all she never had the courage to confess. Therefore, when Dirk confessed to Jake and the two started dating (years ago) Jane blamed herself. It was her fault to be such a coward and let the opportunity to confess pass. It was her fault for being a wimp and isolate herself from her friends (her only friends) because she couldn’t face Jake and Dirk.

All that sadness turned into bitterness, she would describe as bittersweet feeling. She was happy for them in a way, after all Jake was always so lonely she knew he needed Dirk. And Dirk used to be (and still kind of is) so broken. They couldn't possibly resolve each other’s problems, but they were there for one another. Yet there was the bitterness who would clench on her throat and steal her breath away, it made her jaw so tense she would develop a headache. It only got worse when she would go out with them, which wasn't so often, not only because of collage, but because she simply couldn’t. Sometime she thought that the distance between the three of them was only making things worse. Maybe if she had been around more often she wouldn't be so unprepared to see their love so up close.

"So, like I was talking about, he's the biggest dork in the universe ..." Roxy keeps chattering as the two descent the stairs of her house. She still lived with her mother, though Jane had seen Rose 5 times over all those years. "... I think he has an obsession with the number two, even his horns are duplicated ..." Jane pulls her cell phone out of her pocket to call an uber driver, setting the route of the bar they settle with the boys.

"Do you think he has two dicks?"

"My God Roxy, hohoho." Jane can’t hold back her laughter.

"Ah, what's the deal? Don't tell me you wouldn't go for a gentleman with double the trouble?" She gives Jane a wink.

Jane choose to ignore that comment, changing the subject. "I always thought trolls were more violent."

"Yeah, me too! Maybe those are rumours from close-minded people. Sollux is a cutie. Apart from all the times he calls me a bitch.”

"Well, if you are willing to try the black romance thing I think it's normal, right? I have no idea Roxy, just be careful so that he does not impregnate you with alien babies."

"Oh you wish you had the opportunity get impregnated with them alien babies."

___

 

The bar is crowded with college students and smells just like them, a mixture of beer, sweat and cigarettes (the place has Strider written all over). Jane is overwhelmed by the 80's rock and hoped that the music won’t get in their way; after all they always got together to talk and drink up until someone ~~Roxy~~ pass out.

They find the boys outside, where the music is quiet enough. When Jane looks at both of them the burn in her stomach becomes more obvious.

“Hey, why didn't you guys order?” Roxy complains, already missing the alcohol on her system. Which, by the way, she is managing her drinking so much better these days.

"We were waiting for you."

"Howdy madams, both of you are looking stunning this evening."

Well, if you call a grandma-oversized sweater stunning who is Jane to deny it? Jane knows he is just being polite, she was not that innocent girl who falls for his sweet words anymore, (more like a sad and depressing girl, with great taste on thriller movies and pastries).

Jane tries to join the conversation, but her mind keeps insisting on going back to the usual dark thoughts. Sometimes she hated herself for not being able to interact normally with her friends without feeling her stomach burn. After exchanging glances with Dirk for the third time (and she knows he is staring at her underneath those obnoxious shades), Jane decides to cross her alcoholic limit. All she does _NOT_ need right now is Dirk asking if she is ok and all the attention of the table turning to her. So she chugs the rest of her bear.

“Hel yeah, that m gurl."

"Woah Jane, go easy." Jake says a bit worried. Had he noticed Jane was too quiet?

"No way, chug tht siht. I'll go get somthnig stornger."

She drags off her chair before Roxy could. "No, let me go."

Jane gets up from the table feeling dizzy and showing a goofy smile to prove she was fine. She staggered toward the bar, since the waiter who was attending them is too busy having an argument over the phone. Upon arriving at the counter, with some difficulty because of the crowding, Jane feels her foot slip so she throws her weight on the counter, avoiding an ugly fall. Her cheeks heats up with embarrassment.

"Hey, could you give me two drinks?"

"Just two drinks?" The bartender has a smirk on them face.

"Hohoho, anything strong?"

They giggle and start mixing the drinks behind the counter. With the corner of her eyes, she sees a pretty boy looking at her with an amused smile. Even a bit tipsy she finds herself blush, he certainly must be thinking she was wasted.

Two brownish glasses appear in front of her. "Two Long Island Iced Tea, is going to get you fucked." They give her a wink. "What is your table's number, love?"

Jane gives the number to the pleasant bartender, but before she can bring the cocktails back to the table (and regret her life decisions in the next morning), the pretty boy is suddenly next to her, showing an even bigger smile than before.

"So tell me, what a lovely girl like you is doing in a shithole like this?" She can see the playful smirk behind his poor attempt to be cocky. A man with a sense of humour is exactly Jane's type.

"Apparently getting fucked. Oh, I mean, not _like that_. Hohoho." Her face is now burning; she hopes not to be blushing too hard.

"Hahaha. Don't worry, I got what you meant. Are you here with friends?"

"Yeah, we are outside." Please Jane, make up conversation, anything, he is cute and thinks you’re lovely. She can not fuck this up. "And what a place like you doing in a boy like this... oops."

His laugh are also adorable, and she can’t stop her embarrassing yet cute _‘hohohos’_ that only make him laugh even harder. She probably won his heart by now. The laughs cease when a _warm_ arm involves Jane's shoulder. It is Jake; he looks even more beautiful up close and smells wonderful. Jane curses herself for having these kind of thoughts with a pretty and interested boy just in front of her.

"Is everything alright?"

The boy looks uncomfortable, so she takes Jake's arm off her shoulder. "Yes, that's okay. This is... hm..." Then it occurs to her that she doesn't know the boy's name.

"Harold." The boy replies.

"Yes, Harold. We were just chatting."

"Oh." Jake seems confused, he was always a bit slow.

The minimal possibility in leaving Jake jealous comes to Jane's head, well she can dream, can she not? It is useless to hold on to this kind of hope and Jane knows it, but she is intoxicated and Jake is close enough for her to feel that familiar heat on her chest.

"Why don't you take these glasses back to the table? I'll be right back." Jane offers a smile that says _‘don't worry’_.

Jake still seems suspicious, but returns the smile and leaves Jane and the boy, Harold, alone. When Jane turns her eyes at the table, Roxy is winking towards her mouthing _"Get'm gurl"_. She quickly ignores and turn her attention back to Harold.

"Your friend?"

"Yeah, he can be a little over protective."

"He is good friend then." He says, moving closer to Jane. "Your friends look fun."

Inside Jane's head, she can hear Roxy's voice shouting, _"he is the one."_

Harold already graduate and is starting his own business near Jane's University. He is an Aries and his favourite dessert is cheesecake. She notices that he is asking some rather personal questions, such as whether Jane lived by herself or not, but she decides not to jump to conclusions.

After their brief conversation, Jane is beginning to sober up and Harold apparently notices.

"It looks like your friend took your drinks away. Will you let me pay you one?"

"Oh sure."

"Do you drink martini?"

"I drink everything." Oh oops, maybe she shouldn’t have made that comment. However, Harold only laughs away and orders it from the bartender.

"So, you want to open a bakery? Oh Jane, you are stealing my heart. What is your speciality?"

"I've been making lots of soufflé lately because of classes assignments. I ended up getting a taste for them."

The two drinks arrive and Jane makes an effort to stop looking at her friend’s table. Harold will end up thinking that she doesn't want to talk to him, yet looking at Roxy gives her confidence. Jane barely remembers the last boy she flirted with.

He hands her the other glass and Jane feels her body freeze, why is her dirk bubbly? And it has a whitish hue? Looks like a completely different drink from Harold's, Jane is sure he had ordered the same drink as her. _You're being paranoid Jane._ It has been a long time since she dated anyone, Jake is still in Jane's pedestal and she is making things up so she can walk away from the boy and return to a zero corresponding love. It can only be that, _right_?

Anyway, Harold is looking at her strangely and Jane doesn’t want to be rude and reject the drink he paid for. So she takes a small sip and puts the glass on the counter.

Harold is still talking to her and Jane has distracted herself with those ridiculous thoughts.

"'m sorry, what did you say?" She smiles sheepishly.

"I asked you if you met them in college." He says pointing at the table with her chums.

"Oh no, we've known each other forever..."

She begins to tell the story as briefly as possible. The drink has no weird taste and she feels pretty normal (drunk). Jane feels embarrassed to think that someone nice like Harold would do something to her, maybe that's why hardly any boy was interested in her. Cof cof or maybe it is the 7 years of unrequited love cof cof.

Then it happens and it happens so fast that Jane can’t assimilate what is going on. Her tongue went numb and she starts to feel extremely dizzy. Suddenly Harold's body is on her side, his arm around Jane's waist. He starts to move towards outside with long strides. Jane feels too weak to let go. At the same moment, her heart begins to pound on her ribs and her eyes fill with tears. She tries to yell _‘no’_ but her voice is too low to be heard.

No one ever imagines that these things go on like that, so fast, so sudden. She can only imagine what horrible things he will do to her. She tries to catch someone attention on the way, but people look too drunk and just push her hand away.

He passes the restrooms and Jane knows that in a few more steps they will be out of the bar. Her head rises and her eyes meet those so familiar pointy shades. She babbles a _‘Dirk’_ before being dragged out of the bar.

There is a car parked with the passenger door open. Harold pushes her into the car and she holds onto the edge of the door, choosing to use the rest of her strength to fight. Suddenly she is being pull away and manages to hold on the corner of the car for balance.

“What the fuck man? What’s your problem?”

“Get the fuck out, you piece of shit.”

Jane can hear _‘Shit, shit ... let's go.’_ and _‘What about the girl?’_ before the car starts moving. Her body is thrown forward without the support but something holds her, preventing her from falling. She can see Dirk putting his arm around her shoulders and leading her against the building wall.

“Jane oh my god, Jane!”

She can not think straight, everything is fogged. As soon as the shock leaves Jane, she begins to hyperventilate and her tears come down heavily. She knows what was going on, what could have happen, but there are other things going through her mind and she can’t keep a train of thought.

"Are you okay? Jane?" Dirk is talking; his hands grip Jane's arms and she realize she is sitting on the floor.

"Sorry". She manages to let go. "Is all my fault".

"What? You're not making any sense." Jane sees Dirk pulling the phone out of his pocket and her hand stop it weekly.

"Dirk, 'm sorry. I didn't want to make things awkward between us. It's my fault. I should have told him from day one, but I was a coward and now .... my fault. "

"Shh, it's okay now, Jane. You're safe. Listen to me, I need my hand back, ok? I'm going to call Roxy and Jake."

"No! I'm... a friend. Horribl friend." It has become difficult to talk by now. "... Jake .... I love hm ... 'm sorry."

___

 

Jane wakes up with the sound of a door closing nearby, she hastily sits, scared for not remembering last night. She is on a couch, certainly not hers, but it seems familiar. Soon she recognises she is at Dirk's place. She tries to get up from the couch, just to fall on it again. Her head is throbbing and she is welcomed with a strong nausea.

Slowly she begins to remember the events from last night, which only made her nausea worse. She was almost ... _my god!_ Her hands are shaking and she can't tell if it’s from the effect of the drug or pure fear. She doesn't remember very well what she said to Dirk. What had really come out of her mouth and what did she had dreamt? It was difficult to assimilate her thoughts; maybe it was a symptom of what Harold (if that's his real name) put into her drink.

The rest were only brief memories, she remembered someone carrying her, probably Jake since he is the only one strong enough. At some point, someone tried to give her water? It’s hard to remember.

Her mouth is painfully dry. She tries to rise again, but her legs are too wobbly.

"Jane?" It’s Jake. Oh God, she really doesn't want to see Jake right now. Jane feels terrible and sweaty; she just wants a shower and sleep forever. _What if she told him something embarrassing?_

A hoarse _‘hey’_ comes out of her mouth; she clears her throat and tries again. "Can you get me a glass of water?"

"Of course" His eyes are wide with concern. Jake moves fast and when Jane looks forward, he hands her the glass.

She chugs more than half in one go.

"Thanks."

"Jesus Christ Jane. You scared the everfriggin life out of me."

"Yeah." Her eyes are dampen, but she resists the urge of crying, averting that beautiful green at all cost.

"Are you okay? Maybe I should get you to a hospital."

"No! I'm sure if I eat something I'll get better."

"Hm, if you say so."

He crouches down, trying to look at Jane's face, which is staring firmly at the ground. "I am fine, really! You’re going to be late for work." She says, hoping that he would leave her. The way Jake looks at her with such concern only made things worse.

"Okay then, but anything that happens tell Dirk to call me, okay?"

"Okay." She manages to give Jake a weak smile, which he reciprocates caressing her shoulder.

When the door closes behind him Jane lets out a long, contained sigh, what has she done to deserve this? At least she hasn't said anything embarrassing to him, _right_? Oh she hoped so.

On her third attempt to get up the nausea threatens to rise to her throat. Jane practically jumps off the couch heading toward the bathroom, which, thank God, is unoccupied. Her vomit has the bitter taste of alcohol and she murmurs _‘disgusting’_ under her breath trying not to look at the fluids she'd dumped in the toilet. At least, after puking what appeared to be two litters of vodka, Jane feels better, much better! Her stomach rumbles with hunger, but she doesn't really want to stay and confront Dirk. Therefore, the best plan would be to leave as fast as possible.

Aaaand of course he would be in the living room waiting for her, because life liked to play those wonderful pranks. There he was, tall, dark bags under his eyes, shaggy yet dazzling hair, while Jane almost screamed looking at her own reflection.

"Hey, are you feeling alright?" Because Jane was somewhat absent from her friends lives, especially Dirk and Jake’s, she has to remind herself not to meet Dirk's eyes so directly, which are visible at that moment. He was always insecure about them.

She chooses to look down and, oops he was not wearing pants, so her eyes go even further down choosing to stare at Dirk's feet. "Surprisingly I am! God, what a night." She comments, not knowing what else to say.

"Yeah! What the fuck happened?"

"I have no idea. First he offers to pay me a drink and all of sudden I'm being carried out against my will." She decides to leave information that she suspected he’d spiked her drink out since Dirk doesn’t look happy at all and he can be rather _intense_ sometimes.

"Jane, you are no longer a child. You do not accept drinks from strangers!"

"How was I supposed to know he was going to spike my drink in a bar so busy, with my friends a few feet from me?"

"Because there are thousands of assholes in the world who take advantage of careless people like you."

They are both screaming at that point. Jane resists going in the direction that would result in a fight and takes a deep breath, squeezing her eyes with the palm of her hand.

"Sorry." It came out of Dirk's mouth; he seemed to be getting closer, almost as if he was thinking of giving Jane a hug. "You must be feeling awful about all of this."

"Somehow I still haven't acknowledged what happened."

Dirk opens his mouth a few times opting to stay silent, although she knows exactly what he wants to talk about.

"We need to talk." He finally says.

"I suppose so." She says defeated. Yes, they needed to talk about it, now if Jane wanted it is another story.

Jane sits cross-legged, her fingers nipping at her cuticles nervously. Dirk sits by her side, placing the pillow in which Jane was sleeping on his lap.

He is still quiet and Jane hated it with all her might. Dirk's silence was almost like a signal that forced her to speak. She can't understand how he said so many things without even opening his mouth.

"First of all, sorry for being so careless."

"No, do not apologize for that. It's not your fault." He seems sorry for yelling at her.

"I know." Well, there is nowhere to run now. "I shouldn't have said those things last night; it was not the right place nor the right time." A sign. "But it's true; I still kind of have feelings for Jake. I don't want to have feelings for him; I just can not get rid of this thing and arg..." Another sign. "It was wrong to discount it on you, on everybody! I just distanced myself from you guys like that and it was unfair. I don't feel anger or resentment of your relationship, you know right?" She risks looking at Dirk; he is staring at her with an unreadable straight face. _Damn it._ "I'm telling the truth when I say that I'm happy for both of you, I've always been happy, it's just this feeling that I can't get rid of. And ..." She no longer knows what to say, it seemed so much easier when those words were just thoughts. "I was a lousy friend, wasn't I?"

"No Jane, I was the lousy friend. I always knew you never really forgot about Jake, but I decided to ignore it, even though I knew it was making you miserable." Jane keeps nibbling at her cuticles, holding on to her tears.

There is a sudden silence when,

"Confess to him."

_"What?"_

"You should confess and leave these feelings behind. I don't think repressing them is helping you to be honest. "

"Obviously not." Oh great, now she is crying.

"Oh Jane." he says, almost pitifully. This time Dirk's hand finds Jane's free hand, the one that is not being bitten. "You shouldn't be going through this."

"Neither should you, those are my problems."

He dries the tears from her face without looking in her direction. "I am your friend and I want to help you. I want to ... I want to see you happy. "

Her stomach clenches, this time with warmth. Dirk is a good friend and Jane would be an idiot if she didn't try to redeem herself. Yes, that is what she needs to do! She will fix what she ruined; she will gain her friend's confidence back. Being sorry for herself clearly is not helping, and to speak the truth Jane is tired of feeling sorry, tired of crying, and tired of putting herself down. Then at that hour she made a decision, she would confess to Jake and leave all that toxic bitterness behind.

She gives Dirk hand a squeeze, looking at his eyes and giving a smile. "You want breakfast?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really really sorry for the english mistakes (I'm really trying here ;-;). Also, I'm trying not to give up because of the language barrier :c
> 
> If you are interested in being my beta for this fic I would apreciate a lot. I'll leave my twitter and tumblr on the end of this fic.

The frying pan steam fogs Jane's glasses; she pulls it over her hair knowing it’s going to be greasy due to the condition of her locks. Hangovers are horrible, though this is not quite a hangover, is it? How is it called a hangover of illicit substances that were forced upon you? She's still feeling a little dizzy because of the lack of food, which is being solved now with bacon and eggs. Dirk is beside her, taking care of the toasts. Both are quiet, and despite the quietness often annoying Jane, this one is comfortable, almost homelike.

"You don't have to do that, you know?" She can feel his eyes on her behind the shades. Maybe she isn't intimate enough for him to feel comfortable and go without the glasses around her.

"Dirk, I know you think you are made of metal or something not human, but you wrong, and you have to eat."

"Meh, I eat enough."

She gives him a warning glace; her maternal instincts that she hated to admit she had in the first place telling her to lecture him.

Dirk chooses to stay in silence, sitting at the small table against the wall. She still feels his eyes on her back, it’s not like she can do much about it but ignore. Sometimes Jane found Dirk quite odd.

Jane places a large portion of eggs and bacon on Dirk's plate along with an apple she found in the bottom of the fridge, probably belonging to Jake since Dirk doesn't usually eat things that are not processed. It’s a miracle he's still alive, and healthy. He looks at the apple with disgust, but eats without complaining.

"So, about that guy," He says and brings two slices of bacon to his mouth. "What did you two talked about?"

Jane knows the subject isn't going to die so soon, she really doesn't want to keep talking about it, but we're talking about Dirk Strider and he always gets his way.

"Normal stuff. I doubt that half of what he said was true. He graduated in something involving business? I don't know." She takes a sip of her coffee. "Oh, he did say he had a business near my campus."

"Hm. That doesn't sounds good. "

"Yeah, but, again, I doubt it's true."

"Either way, we don't know if it's true or not."

"I'll try to find out." Not that she really wanted to do it, but it's the only way to get Dirk to stop talking.

"Don't you have night classes?"

"A few. Why?"

"I will pick you up."

"No you won't."

He says nothing, just looks at her. She can see the orange iris above the lenses.

"Don't bother with this, please."

"Which days are your classes?"

What is the use in arguing with him, especially _him_? "Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Fridays." She sighs loudly, so he’ll know she's not happy about this. As if complaining would prevent Dirk from doing what he wanted.

___

 

When Jane arrives at her apartment, smelling like bacon and regret, Nepeta had just gotten out of the shower, she had probably gone out with her morai?, moira?, _best friend_ to work out that morning. Nepeta was really rip.

"Hey, you're back early!" She says with that smile full of pointy teeth. Jane had thought more than once on asking Nepeta to let her touch her teeth, but sounded rude to ask this kind of thing to a troll or anyone really.

"Yeah." Jane says, the fatigue evident in her voice, in her face, in her soul.

"Did something happen?"

"Lots of things." She falls onto the couch, running her hands through her thick hair.

Nepeta sits down next to her, ready to listen to all she had to say, since Nepeta was the sweetest and kindest girl she ever met and Jane didn't deserve to have her as a roommate. Out of the corner of her eyes Jane stares at her defined muscles and feels only a tingle of jealousy.

Jane didn't feel that comfortable to tell personal stuff to Nepeta yet, after all the two of them began living together not a while ago. However, the way she looked at her made Jane tell the whole story, even the details she didn't dare tell Dirk. She was interested in helping Jane figure out if Harold actually worked nearby, which relieved Jane. Nepeta might be small, very small, but all trolls were physically strong, at least stronger than humans were.

After sending Roxy a really long text, explaining what had happen, Jane decides to put an end to that story and take her long and well-deserved shower. There are more important things to focus now! She would confess to Jake, she would confess as soon as possible to Jake and that idea made her even more anxious.

In front of the fogged mirror, she looks steadily into her tired eyes. "Jake, I need to tell you something." She takes a deep breath; it’s easy to talk when the object of her confession is miles away. "I've always loved you, and- and _what_ Jane?" She growls to herself. It'll be stupid to just say _'I love you'_ , it's not the time to be that kind of direct, it will be necessary to prepare a speech. At least she already has an idea of what to do until the big day arrives.

___

 

Nepeta is waiting for her near the campus entrance, alone. Which is a relief, that _friend_ of hers made Jane a little nervous.

"So I discovered these companies near the campus-"

"Wow, when did you research for that?"

"Oh. I have contacts. Hehe,"

"Thank you Nepeta." Would it be okay to hug her now?

Jane decides to hold the girl's hand, which makes Nepeta pull her into a hug, saying goodbye to Jane after warning her to be careful with her investigation.

It was late spring, so it always got colder at night, that way Jane chose to wear a big hoodie and leggings. Who get dressed to college anyway? Her classes on that Tuesday night were only theoretical, and is hard to concentrate when Roxy keeps sending messages to her. Apparently, she’s working overtime and ongoing flirting with her boss. Jane really needs to pay attention; it is not her fault if Roxy's situation is way more interesting than the history of oriental cooking.

After her exchange with Dirk, Jane decided to open herself to Roxy. Roxy even called her after the thousands messages Jane left, saying how much she cared for Jane and would be with her regardless of what happened, which only made Jane feel guiltier for being so selfish.

As soon as her class is over, she sends a message to Dirk, who responds immediately telling her to wait at the campus. She must have really scared him for him to be acting that overly suspicious. Which, to be honest, made her very frustrated. Was this the side of Dirk that no one ever seen? That side that sometimes Jake complains about?

"Hey, sis!" A tall and lean troll appears by her side, taking her by surprise.

"Hello Gamzee." She replies with a smile, having to turn her head up so she can look into his purplish eyes. Jane is a tall girl **,** she is almost the same height as Jake, but Gamzee is one of the tallest person (alien?) she'd ever met.

"Damn, I never see you around at this motherfucking hour."

"Haha, I'm waiting for a friend." She giggles in discomfort, but knew that it was Gamzee's _quirk_ to curse that much. "Do you have class tonight, Gamzee? I thought you didn't take night classes because of work. "

"Nah haha, I've changed all my fucking classes schedule, motherfucker."

Oh God, she really doesn't want to know _how_ Gamzee scheduled his classes.

"I'm doing all these shit classes tonight, do you think I have some with you? Haha, I have no idea, sis. "

_Don't meddle in his business. Do. NOT. Meddle._

Jane sighs loudly. "Let me see." And she meddles.

The document, completely crumpled, with his class schedules is placed on Jane's hands. Why was he doing urban planning? But yes, he was in the same evening classes as her, which were all about pastry and confectionery.

"Looks like we're going to see each other on wednesdays and fridays." She says, struggling not to scold him for that disorganization.

Gamzee peeks at his own schedule over Jane's shoulder, smiling with those pointy teeth, pointier than Nepeta’s. The troll was quite scary, his eyes, which were beginning to turn purple, focused at her from time to time, but it seemed he was not 100% there. Jane tried not to show her discomfort around him, he was always so kind and never gave her any reason to fear him.

"Hey." Dirk suddenly is standing in front of them.

"Oh! You didn't have to get inside. "

"Nah. It's no problem."

Jane can feel Dirk's eyes on Gamzee.

"This is my colleague of, um, some classes, Gamzee. Gamzee, my childhood friend Dirk. "

"Hey." Dirk repeats.

"Hey there, motherfucker."

Dirk raises a brow. _Well, isn't this pleasantly awkward._

"Er, see you tomorrow then. Good evening, Gamzee." She hands the schedule back to Gamzee, waving him farewell.

He again shows his teeth to her, narrow eyes looking at them leave.

"Who the fuck was that?"

"Gamzee." She answers, not really paying much attention.

"What a creepy dude."

"He is not so bad when you get know him?"

"You don't seem very sure."

"Did you drove here?" Jane's apartment is not that far from the campus, but Dirk's house is.

"You know those kind of guys, always quiet, everyone thinks they're not that bad until one fine day he gets possessed by some internal trauma from when he was a kid and realizes that his uncle was Santa or some shit all along, then he gets a gun from his dead grandpa and kills some kids in the middle of the cafeteria. _Oh, he was always so quiet, but seemed nice_." He shakes his head. "I borrowed from Bro."

"Is your brother in town?"

"Yeah, arg. But he won't stay long. I hope he doesn't stay long."

"Hoho, I like him."

"Jane, please don't."

She keeps laughing at Dirk's face, which has turned into something other than his usual poker face. Dave's car was absolutely ridiculous, she loved it. It was a ghastly shade of red with a few rusty stains. There’s piles of trash inside, from fast food folders to an old keyboard that never left the backseat. Actually, it was impossible to get in the backseat! Jane suspected that the older Strider was about to get rid of that old thing. And by getting rid of it she means give it to Dirk.

"I was thinking." He continues. "And really, I don't want to pressure you or anything."

"What is it?"

"Really, Jane. I would feel awful if you felt pressured by me. Maybe I shouldn't have gotten myself into this. Am I snooping? Oh my god I am snooping."

Jeez, it’s almost comical. Jane would never say such a thing of course. "First I need to know what is the _snooping_ about."

"Jake."

"Oh."

The silence swell between them. No matter how Jane tried, there was always that silence between them.

"Maybe you, I mean you and Roxy, could come by friday. Jake was longing to celebrate our new home, even though it's not new, he only moved in. Anyway, perhaps I can facilitate things for you? "

"Oh."

Maybe it’s better to say something; she doesn’t want to make Dirk uncomfortable.

"Sorry, I'm still very nervous with the confession thingy."

"Shit. No problem. I should not have pressured you."

"No. Let's do this!"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, we're making this happen."

He raises his hand to Jane high five it, which she does with a loud clap. She could see that Dirk was nervous, which only made her even more anxious. Also, why was he helping her? Not that she thought Dirk had a malice motive or anything similar, he just wasn't good with feelings, his or anyone else’s. Perhaps he felt bad for Jane? Was he thinking he had any fault on the matter? Or maybe he was only trying to be a nice friend and she should accept his support without doubting his reasons.

___

 

"You're the biggest idiot to ever inhabit, not only this fucking pink monkey infested planet, but stupider than the humans themselves, stupider than the damn petbeasts that these retarded humans insist on adopting as if it were on sale in the worst petbeast market of existence. Adopt one canine animal and get five more worthless beasts for free! What do they do, you wonder? Shit all over your house! And guess what, you have to waste your time taking care of them. What were we talking about? "

"Sopor pie?" Jane says, not even bothering to hold back her laugh from Karkat’s absurd comment. "Yeah, I cannot believe you ate that thing."

"Sis, you have no idea! It's the best fucking thing you can dream of. It's kind of a lemon pie elixir that melts in your taste buds. Motherfucker miracles."

"But it is bad for your head. Sorry, _thinkpan_?" It's not a question, but Jane wants to be sure.

"Of course it is! Why do you think this lunatic operates the way he does?" Karkat roars, he’ll have a exam within 30 minutes that he had forgotten about, meaning he's pretty stressed up. "I'm already screwed anyway. I'm the biggest failure that ever lived in this universe. I shouldn't even try to make this fucking test, it's useless and a waste my time."

"Hey, don't say that. You never know! Maybe you'll do better off unprepared than if you had studied?" Jane liked to say that she is a positive person, even if it's not 100% true.

"Oh, I'll do it. I didn't miss half-sweep of my existence to not do the assignments of this worthless class." He says running his hands through his tangled hair and checking his phone next. "Oh shit, gotta go."

"Good luck!"

"See you later, brother."

Jane feels an icy breeze slip through her bare back, her skin shivers and she hugged her own self for some warmth. Normally she had a dressing rule to wear as comfortable as possible, if she needs to suffer and study (even if it is studying something she likes) she will do it by wearing clothes twice as her size. However, today is the _big day_ , and, besides ignoring the anxiety settling in her stomach she decided to wear a flowered dress that left her back uncover.

_Hey, if she was going to be awkwardly rejected, she'll do it with style!_

Gamzee takes a small cigarette from behind his pointy ear. _Is that a joint?_ He offers to Jane, who denies it immediately. Than pulls a lighter from his jeans pocket, Jane wonders when it was the last time he washed those clothes and, most importantly, when was the last time he washed his hair? This is the most chaotic mess she has ever laid eyes on, worse than Karkat's. The makeup on his face looked really sticky and oily.

When he notices Jane staring, mistaken her gesture as a wish for contact, he throws his arm across the seat they are on being careful not to touch her shoulders. It's a friendly gesture, and Jane moves closer to him, even with the smoke irritating her lungs.

"I didn't know you smoked." Jane sees Dirk with Jake walking towards them. _Oh, he came along._ She waves at them before returning her attention to the tall troll.

"Oh, it calms me down, not as much as the motherfucking sopor."

Oh yeah. He did mention he had trouble controlling his temper, or something.

"Jane. Hello?" Jake says, his eyes falling on Gamzee before returning to her. Knowing how Jake is old-fashioned, or rather a true grandfather, she knew he is judging Gamzee. Which is terribly hypocritical of her to think, after all she did the same thing when she met the troll for the first time.

"So..." Jake looks from Jane to Gamzee and vice-versa. He couldn't be more obvious if he wanted to.

"Gamzee, a friend from class." She says pointing to Gamzee, who, after two drags begins to relax.

"Hey, brother."

She stands up, not wanting the situation to become even more uncomfortable. At least it would be for them, at that moment Gamzee did not have a care in the world. Speaking of which, shouldn’t he be leaving? From what Jane knows (and she is starting to baby him), he doesn’t have the last period of the night.

"You're not leaving?"

"Nah, gonna wait for Karkat." He says, taking another drag. Still, it is plenty of time to wait for someone. Well, they are moirals! And Jane didn't have enough confidence to speak about troll culture. So she shrugs.

"We'll see each other next week then. Bye-bye."

"Bye, sis."

Jane slips onto Dirk's side, still not quite comfortable to have any kind of contact with Jake. And after tonight, she would be even more uncomfortable with Jake, at least it will be if things don't go as planned. Of course, Jane had prepared her speech, and it was a great speech, but it was impossible to tell what Jake's reaction would be. Probably something like: _‘Gosh Jane! I'm sorry for being such a sucker, I had no idea.’_ or he could be even denser and the situation would be so uncomfortable that not even a hole opening and swallowing her would made her feel less embarrassed.

"Was that the _clown_ you were telling me about?" Jake turns to Dirk.

"Yep."

"Jane," Jake says, leaning forward to be able to look into her eyes, which means he is _really_ serious about it. "I don't think you should hang out with that young troll."

"Why is that?"

"He doesn't seems like a good influence."

Jane rolls her eyes; this time making sure the gesture was visible. "You are exaggerating! Gamzee is very sweet when you get to know him better." She manages to stop before saying: _'It's not like you're one of the best influences around here.'_ Normally Jane wouldn't restrain herself, at least not with Jake, but it is best to not tense things up, at least not tonight.

That doesn’t stop Jake from his lecture on the why she should be wary around the troll. Dirk seems to notice Jane's annoyance, it is impossible not to notice, and he quickly changes the subject.

"So here is my pile of junk." Dirk says, pointing to his now own vehicle. "What am I going to do with this fossil? I bet it would explode if walked more than 60 km/h. "

"Ah Dirk, you should give Linda a chance." Jake says, offering one of his smiles that never fails to melt Jane's heart. No, sorry. _Melted_ , in the past!

"Please don't name my car."

At least the keyboard is no longer in the backseat; Jane was already thinking she would have to sit on someone's lap. Er, better not think about her butt on ~~Jake~~ someone's lap. Definitely not a good idea!

Dirk starts the car a couple of times only for it to die. After a weary sigh from him, Jane thought it couldn't get any worse.

_Great_ , Jane and her big mouth. On Roxy's behalf, she had no idea that tonight was going to be the big night. In that way, Jane can’t do anything other than answer with a sad emoji and: _'No problem Rox. Good luck on your date!'_ , followed by: _' I demand details later ;B '_.

They end up in a McDonalds near Jane's house, deciding to forget about the supposed party. It’s not like any of them would cook for the occasion, Jake was still learning to cook something other than pasta and Dirk, well, it was best not to leave Dirk near a stove, let alone a kitchen.

If it’s Jane's idea to confess her 7 year’s repressed feelings at a McDonalds on the corner of her house? The answer is obvious, isn't it? But she doesn't want to and can't give up. She is more than determined. And, on the bright side, she can now eat something extremely greasy that will give her the motivation and strength she needs.

"Dag nab it! What a disastrous night. "Jake says as he tosses his fries around. He has never been a big fan of greasy food, but it was two against one, and who wanted to eat vegan food on a friday night?

"Don't worry about it Jake, we'll always have another weekend. I'll even make that apple pie you like so much." It's enough to put a smile on his face. He looked better with a smile on his face.

Deep inside Jane knew that Jake was selfish and often a not so nice friend (not that she could criticize, especially after all those years), yet her impulse in seeing him unhappy was to do anything in her power to please him, even if it was something momentary. She didn't want to do it anymore, she wouldn't do it anymore!

The place was getting less busy when Jane found her courage.

"Jake, I need to tell you something." God! That greasy hamburger is making Jane's stomach suffer even more.

"Um, do you want to do this here? We can go back home, or?" Dirk says and Jane can’t lie that she feels a little bad bringing him in the middle of this.

"Guys? You're scaring me here, hehe."

Dirk ignores him. "Should I, um, leave?"

"No, you can stay if you want." Which he does, and Jane thanks him mentally for not leaving her alone with Jake.

She takes a deep breath one more time. "Jake, I need to tell you this and it's a bit serious? Or very serious! Arg, I'm babbling, sorry. Anyway, I want you to hear me until the end and don’t interrupt, okay? This is very difficult for me."

The worry on his face is making her tremble.

_Remember your speech!_

"I've hidden something from you for a long time, and that something is the reason why I distance myself and became a not so present friend. But I don't want you to feel like you're the one to blame! It's all my fault, for not having said anything since the beginning."

"Jane, you're scaring me."

She brings her index finger in front of Jake's face, so he would let her continue.

"The truth is, do you remember when you asked me whether I liked you or not, that years ago? So, yeah I lied. Jake, I've always liked you, I've always loved you and I might- No! I still like you. I know it's foolish of me to still hold on to these feelings, gosh it's not like I'm still a teenager! Dirk and I talked about this last weekend and he encouraged me to tell you the truth. I hadn't thought that keeping these feelings to myself was only making things worse, that's why I'm being real with you and me, so I can finally put these feelings behind and become the friend you deserve."

Is it hot in here or is it her? Jane is literally sweating. She decides not to look directly at Jake.

"Really, sorry for being so distant! I hope we can continue being friends. It would be a nightmare for me to make you uncomfortable. I'm telling you the true because I want to move on. Does that make sense? Haha."

Her eyes fall on Jake to see his mouth ajar and it's exactly like Jane imagined he would react. Dirk gives a small smile encouraging her and it’s like half of the weight on her back disappeared. Which only made her understand how much she needed him there.

The silence was stretching beyond normal. Jane sees Dirk pocking Jake for an answer, which he gives.

"Wait a minute, Dirk knew before me?" Jake looks ... irritated?

"Um?" Jane feels all the blood go to her head; she probably looks like a tomato right now. At least Dirk also looks confused, she isn't the only one completely lost.

"I always knew. Well, it was kind of obvious, wasn't it?"

"Er, does that bother you? Roxy also knows." At another time, Jane would find Jake's reaction somewhat insensitive, but she is so distressed after confessing that all she can do is sweat.

 "What? No, no... sorry." He says, not really convincing. "Jane, I'm sorry. I had no idea you felt this way. I feel like an asshole."

"No. You had no way of knowing. "

"Still..." Jake seems uncomfortable. This is not going at all as Jane imagined.

"We can continue being friends, right?"

"Jane, of course! I'll always be your friend." Finally, something that sounded convincing.

After her kind of successful but not entirely expected confession, Jake is being strangely quiet. It’s like he is more upset about not knowing before anyone than the actual friendship threatening feelings. Anyhow, she’s relieved to have chosen to do it by the end of the night, if not she would have to endure the uncomfortable silence all night long.

When Jane finally calmed down, (heavens! being honest with friends could be emotionally draining) Jane realized how bizarre all that was. Maybe it was a normal development? It's not like she were an expert in confessing her unrequited love to one of her closest friends. She had not even gone through any similar situation. All she feared was that things would become awkward between them, even more than already was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If I start to feel that the grammar mistakes are getting too shitty, I'll delete. I don't like doing bad quality things.
> 
> Tumblr: http://spookyookiekookie.tumblr.com/  
> Twt: @lemonPuddi


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally I'm back haha.  
> So, some people told me this is not as bad grammatically as I though. I'll really try to keep writing c: (And if someone wants to beta this for me I will gladly accept <3)
> 
> *Sorry for any mistakes!!

"You should have told me!" Roxy says, sober and angry. "If I had known I would been there for you."

"You don't have to worry, Roxy. It was not a big deal."

"Not a big deal?" And... it just made things worse. _Good one, Jane!_ "You have a crush on Jake since I've known you!"

Jane doesn't know how to respond to that, she hopes she haven`t hurt Roxy. It's not that she didn't want to tell Roxy, but the idea didn't cross her mind.

"Don't make that face, I just wanted to be there to support you." Roxy responds. She rubs Jane's arms, seeking to comfort her. "I can’t believe Jake did that. How can he be so selfish?”

"So it was strange, right? It's not just me. "

"No! It was super weird and inappropriate. He only thought about himself! Well, it kinda was about him, but he could take into consideration how difficult it was for you."

Jane sighs deeply, already feeling a headache coming. "You know what? Just forget about it. Yes, he was a jerk, but I don't want to stress over this anymore! God, I can not stand those stupid feelings anymore and stupid Jake." She throws herself against Roxy's bed, feeling the anger building up inside her. She doesn't want to take it out on Roxy. If anyone deserved her anger, that someone was Jake.

"But what about you?" Jane says before Roxy could go on about Jake. "How was your date with... hm....”

"Sollux?"

"Yes!"

Roxy always talked about her boss with a smile, which made Jane happy, and maybe just a little jealous. Sometimes Jane felt like Roxy was hers. But Jane knew that, getting to know Sollux better, she would end up liking the troll. It's hard for Jane to find someone she disliked.

Sollux and Roxy spent the whole night playing games and drinking wine. Roxy swore to Jane that she only drank this time, and they didn't usually drink alcohol when going out. Still, Jane decides to keep an eye on her! After all those years, Roxy had stopped drinking every day, only socially. However, Jane felt a need to check on her friend, since Roxy`s mother was basically non-existent in the girl's life.

Jane puts on her sneakers and gets ready to walk back to her apartment when she remembers. "And if you stand me up again this weekend I'll be very angry, Lalonde!"

"Oh no. Are you going to punish me, Miss Crocker? "

"Perhaps. Hoohoo." She raises her eyebrows suggestively. "No, but seriously!"

"Yes ma'am. I wouldn't lose your baked goods for nothing in this world. "

 

Jane walks in quick strides, usually Jane would jog rather slowly to enjoy the scenery, but it is starting to get dark and she's not a fan. Jane was a morning person, she loved the cool breeze and the smell of the serene, but mostly she loved breakfast. Maybe that is what she needs, to wake up early, have a nice cup of coffee, and enjoy the view from her humble balcony. These last few weeks are being extremely stressful!

It's not like she imagined that everything was going to be wonderful after the confession. Jane was aware that would take time until her relationship with Jake went back to normal. But she didn't imagine he would react like that, and she really didn't want to jump to conclusions, but it seemed that he was _irritated_ with her. She had to control herself to avoid asking Dirk how Jake was dealing with it. She needed to give him space to think! And she would not ruin everything with her insecurity.

When Jane arrives near the university campus, closed since it is a Sunday, she notices a few people jogging down the street, teenagers drinking near the park, and someone familiar. _Where did she know that person?_ Jane narrows her eyes. _Damn it_. She can no longer procrastinate; her glasses prescription needs to be checked for yesterday!

Jane moves closer, trying to peek through the moving cars. It is on the tip of her tongue, who is this...

She knows exactly who _he_ is. The man who almost ruined her life, the man who drugged her and made her cry in fear. _Harold_. He walked so freely, without worries, without fear. The smile on the man's face was almost drawn on, as he spoke on his phone. Jane feels her blood chill, but she is ready for this moment! She is a professional after all.

With an agility she didn't think she had, she crosses the street, hiding behind a parked van. Harold walks slowly, spinning a wad of keys in his hand. She is still on the lookout, her eyes does not detach from the man's profile. Carefully she accompanies him, hiding behind the parked cars to avoid being seen. He then stops in front of an old and small building, climbing the stairs on the side to the second floor shops.

"Gotcha." She whispers to herself and, making sure he can not see her, continues on her way home.

___

 

**Sent to D. Strider 06:15pm**

Found the criminal

Seen walking on V. Konder St, at 6:15 pm

Entered the second floor shop on top of the ice cream parlor

Wait for more information. I'm onto him!

 

Nepeta isn't home when Jane arrives, her heart beating fast with adrenaline. And, well, she can’t lie, she is excited. The thrilling feeling of chasing someone, chasing a criminal! Maybe she is graduating in the wrong major. Should she try entering the police forces?

Taking advantage of her sudden animation, Jane decides to take a bubble bath, enjoying the water heat on her tired muscles. When finished she stumbles upon several messages from Dirk, which is not looking very happy.

 

**D. Strider Sent 07:20pm**

What the fuck you talking about?

Jane?

Fuck

Please don't tell me you're playing detective with a damn rapist

Are you out of your mind?

 

She feels somewhat guilty; she is taking years of Dirk life getting into these dangerous situations. And it is precisely because of these reasons he is watching Jane's head as if she was the president in the middle of an election parade. At least she knows that the possible rapist (a real investigator never infers in her findings!), really has a business near the campus, or at least works there! It is her chance to surrender him to justice, or at least report him to the authorities. And, after discovering Harold work schedules, Jane would no longer bother Dirk by making him escort her home. If there is something Jane hated is being a nuisance in someone's life. Especially if this someone were such a dear friend like Dirk.

___

 

Only in her head to think that Dirk wouldn't flip over her _investigation_ , which according to her, not even Sherlock himself could do better. Okay, Sherlock would do a thousand times better than her. If it was Mr. Holmes, Harold would be behind bars by now. But no, Dirk didn't like it at all. He have made her a hostage inside that old car, forcing her to listen to his monologues for an hour. How can someone enjoy the sound of his own voice so much?

Of course, Jane doesn't verbalize any of that. She feels like a 5 year old who got caught eating cookies before dinner. And Jane is not that self-centred, she knows that what she did was a little dangerous. Maybe not as much as Dirk makes it sound, it's not like she had approached Harold in person, _jeez_.

Dirk finally finishes his sermon. She takes advantage of that sudden silence.

"So... do you think he's angry?"

"Jake? No. Why do you think that?"

Jane sighs, leaning against the passenger seat. "I have no idea what to think anymore. At the same time I’m frustrated that he had that kind of reaction, I feel like I need to give him space. I mean, I didn't give him any reason to be mad at me, did I? "

"He's not mad at you."

"Then why is he acting like this? Jake only answers my messages that coldly when he's bothered."

Dirk nibbles at his fingernails, a lousy habit he could not quite get rid of.

"I think he..."

She waits and waits, but he doesn’t finishes the sentence. "He what?"

"Forget about it. You're right to give him space, I guess. You know how he needs to think through on his own."

It is true! Jake needs space that is precisely why Jane is being so careful not to suffocate the boy. Even though she craved to confront what was going on in Jake's head.

She holds Dirk's hand, the one that isn't being bitten, and brings to her lap. Holding the boy's big, cold hands in hers, small and warm. With her thumb, she fondles his joints. "I know it's hard for you and that's exactly why I'm so grateful that you stood by my side that day."

Dirk averts her eyes; avoiding even her direction, fixing his gaze on the horizon. "I feel guilty."

"Don’t blame yourself." She sighs, already knowing Dirk was blaming himself. And knowing that he would continue to feel guilty regardless of what she said. "Dirk, really. There’s nothing that you could have done to prevent this from happening, because you are not to blame. It's my fault for being such a coward and left to sort it out almost 10 years later, and it's a bit of Jake fault for being so dense."

She takes her fingers to Dirk's jaw, making him look into her eyes. "It's not your fault."

Jane releases Dirk's face and hand when the boy's neck begins to redden. It was so difficult, when Jane thinks she is beginning to understand Dirk he shows just how _illegible_ he can be. When something bothered Roxy she would change the subject, Jake would run away, but Dirk, Dirk would endure. Maybe that's why Jane treated him so carefully, because she knew he would endure anything, no matter how uncomfortable it might be.

___

 

The bus was practically empty, yet some curious glances were directed at her. Jane tried to tuck the two pies in a plastic bag so that the scent would not spread so much, but it was in vain, after all, she had baked the pies that day, they were still warm. They would finally meet at Dirk's house (and now Jake's). And despite her relationship with Jake being turbulent due to recent events, Jane was happy.

First, Dirk had ceased being Jane's nanny. Not that she didn't like Dirk's company, but she knew how much work the boy had to do. Fixing electronics and building robots took time and Jane didn't want to be the one to get in Dirk's way. However, Jane could see that Dirk looked a little distant in the last few days.

Second, she was meeting her friends constantly and that made her heart warm. There was a possibility that her grades wouldn't be so warm due to the loss of time she had previously, which she only used to study. But Jane wouldn't risk her friends again, and she could do both at the same time. Whoever said it’s impossible to go to college and maintain an active social life didn't know Jane Crocker.

There was something else that put a smile on her face, _somebody_. Jane hadn't found anyone attractive in a while, the last person was her ex-almost-boyfriend, who could never overcome Jake in her eyes. This _someone_ was walking with Gamzee and Karkat and, unlike the two, he seemed so _social_. Not that the two weren’t, at least with Jane, but trolls weren't known for their social skills, they were more reserved. But this troll, he greeted her with a gentle smile. And the fact that he was extremely handsome just made Jane's eyes sparkle. He was taller than she was which gained him a few points and the fact that the troll horns were gigantic only made him even more attractive in a weird way.

It was too early to tell if she had a crush on Rufioh, she didn't even know if he was single or not, but it was good to feel interest in other people again.

When Jane arrives at the Strider's residence, she is surprise at how clean the place still is, and how exhausted Dirk looks. He looks paler than usual, and when she peeks into the corners of his shades, there are dark circles under his eyes. When was the last time the boy had a good night's sleep?

As she steps inside the apartment, Dirk took the pies out of her hand, stuffing his nose into the bag.

"I couldn't please everyone, Roxy asked me to make the pumpkin one for her and I promised Jake the apple."

"So you have favourites."

She laughs, slapping the boy's arm lightly. Doesn't he feel cold wearing a sleeveless shirt on a cold spring night? That's why Dirk was always so chilly.

Jake is in the living room, sitting on one foot and surfing Netflix. When he notices Jane, he avoids the girl's eyes, saying a shy _‘Hey.’_ and biting his lips. She takes a deep breath. What did Jane expect? That Jake actually had initiative?

"Hey." She slumps into the armchair beside the couch, resting her elbows on her knees. "I made the pie you like." Jane offers him a small smile.

"Oh, you didn't have to."

"No?"

"Kidding, hehe. I was almost begging you. "

She giggles and feels the tense atmosphere between them disappears. "And how are things at work?"

To pretend that nothing had happened and soon after giving Jake an opening to talk about himself is the right recipe to make the boy happy. If there’s something Jake likes is to talk about himself. Why does Jane like him? _Liked! In the past_. We already talked about this.

Jake works at a botanical garden in a nearby city, so Jane didn't mind the boy spending most of their time talking about himself, since a lot of what he said was actually interesting. Especially when he was talking about the older tourists trying to get some seedlings back home.

Dirk cuts them off, leaning against the back of the chair behind Jane. "Roxy will be late."

Jane turns, feeling betrayed. "What? She promised to come."

"She will, only later? She's having dinner with the kind-of-boyfriend-who-hates-her-but-not-really troll "

"Aaarg Roxy." Of course she sent the message warning her delay to one of the boys instead of her, because Roxy knew Jane would give her a piece of her mind.

"Don't even worry Jane, this is just dandy! I was euphoric to show you this movie. No doubt you'll love it." He jumps off the couch toward the DVD stacks, with a smile on his face.

_Oh great!_

The problem with watching movies with Jake was that he would not _shut up_. She didn't blame him thought, he liked these movies so much that he couldn't handle his excitement.

Well, at least Jake isn’t avoiding her anymore!

"Can we eat the pies? Or would it be more appropriate to wait for Roxy?" Dirk asks.

"She doesn’t deserve anything appropriate!" Jane says, not even bothering to hide her grumpiness.

"Don't be like this Janey! At least she warned us." Jake says contentedly, examining each DVD with sparkles in his eyes. Could they watch the movie through Netflix? Probably. But Jake was nothing but old-fashioned.

"Well then. Going to make popcorn." Dirk turns and heads towards the kitchen.

"And I'll make sure he doesn't burn it." Jane gets up right away while Jake lets out a goofy laugh.

"Hey, so you know, I'm a master with the microwave. Gordon Ramsey would piss himself." He says, pulling a huge bowl from the cupboard.

"Are you alright?"

"Why the question?" He says without paying much attention to Jane.

"Don't know. You look tired."

"I'm not."

She rubs her eyes with her hands, suppressing her displeasure. _Calm down!_ Don't pressure him. "You know you can count on me, right? I'm all ears for whatever you need. "

At any moment Dirk turns towards her, or give any answer. Gosh, why were those two so _difficult_? Why couldn't they sit and talk like normal people? It’s what Jane wants to say, scream, in their faces. But being friends with them for so many years, she knew that being so direct was asking them to flee (Jake) or to avoid her for a long time (Dirk and Jake).

_Boys and their awkwardness in showing feelings, am I right?_

Both of them return to the living room and Jane returns to her armchair, choosing to leave the sofa for the boys, but her idea is interrupted by Jake patting between him and Dirk on the sofa. Oh, so it's going to be one of _those_ movies where Jake literally stops between scenes to explain the plot. Jane didn't want to admit it, but she secretly liked it when he did it with bad movies. Which was the case! Dirk even choked on his drink when Jake revealed that they would watch The Mummy Returns.

"For starters," He says, turning to Jane who snuggles between them. "Brendan Fraser does such a good job in this movie and Rachel Weisz is so gorgeous!" His excitement is almost surreal. As surreal as the thought that this movie is actually good. Jane can tell that Dirk is rolling his eyes behind the shades.

It wasn’t even 10 minutes of film and Jake is already pausing and talking about the whole plot. Jane must really be in a good mood, because she has to bite her lips to keep from laughing. He is a complete goose. Dirk isn't helping her either, out of the corner of her eye she can see him holding back a smile that threatens to burst at any moment.

How she likes being with those two!

In the middle of the movie, Jake rests one of his arms on the back of the sofa behind Jane. And _whoa_ , he is like an oven! He makes up for Dirk's chilliness; Jane even has to roll up her coat sleeves. At least Dirk has someone to keep him warm. That kind of thought still bothered Jane a little, but the intimacy between the two boys was gradually becoming tolerable for her. In other words, she was really getting over Jake.

She notices Dirk moving closer to her. Is he bothered by Jake's sudden approach? Dirk wasn’t the jealous type. Okay, let me rephrase that, he didn't let his jealousy show up. But he never felt jealous towards Jake and her. He moves close enough that the side of his thigh make contact with Jane's knees, that sat cross-legged. But what confuses her is when the boy's freckled hand rests comfortably on her thigh. Dirk initiating physical contact with someone other than his boyfriend? As the older Strider says: _it must be Christmas up in here_.

It must be almost the end of the movie, Jane couldn't say for sure all her attention was all spent because of Jake's blabbering, when Roxy arrives. The door must be unlocked because she scares them when suddenly entering the living room.

"Oh, am I interrupting something?" She says surprisingly sober.

"Um, no?" Jane has no idea what Roxy is talking about.

"You three look really cute together." She sits down in the chair throwing some negative comment about the movie.

The moment that the comment comes out of Roxy's mouth Dirk's hand disappears from Jane's lap. Curious, but cute, that’s what Jane is thinking. She is glad Dirk finally wanted to exchange affection with her. You know Jane, she loves a good snuggle.

"So Roxy dear, how was your date with your ... er ... boyfriend?" Jake asks.

"Not my boyfriend! Yet," She says, removing her scarf. "And it was great. He's so funny and sexy." She lets out a chuckle that sounded like a purr and Jake cringes beside Jane. "I'm so happy; I hope you guys can meet soon."

"I hope to meet him soon too, Roxy." Jane says, choosing not to confront the girl about being late. She had been so happy lately; the girl's happiness was clinging to Jane.

"It's so nice to like someone; it's been a long time since I've been interested in anyone."

"Yeah." It comes out of Jane's mouth by accident. And all three look at her.

"Oh, Miss Jane got her eyes on someone."

Jane doesn't blush easily, she was proud of it, but at that moment she feels her face heat up. "Er, no. I mean, I barely know the guy. "

"So it's a guy. Tell me more..." Roxy gives a smirk.

Jake removes his arm, which was still behind Jane, rather brutally, pushing her in the process. He murmurs an apology.

"It's a troll, Gamzee's friend, you know that strange guy who does some classes with me. Anyway, I met him today. Jeez, I just found him handsome it's not like I have a crush on him. "

"Oooh, you should totally hit on him. Don't waste time girl."

Jane was about to tell how handsome and friendly the troll was, but Jake stands up sharply beside her. "Hey, Jane made some sweets for us. We should, um, go eat them? Yeah!"

_What?_

But Roxy doesn't show the same confusion as Jane, the blonde just gets up in a jump, excited. "Pumpkin pie? Jane I love you." She squeals and jumps towards the kitchen, following Jake.

Jane turns to Dirk, seeking out if she was the only one who thought that was strange. _Was she losing her mind?_

"Is he okay?"

"Don't you think you're moving on too fast?" He says, with a seriousness that scares Jane. "I don't know. Forget what I said."

He gets up, leaving her alone, confused and a little hurt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay :c In my defence I write this fic also in portuguese and my original history (Which, if you speak portuguese and have interest, you can read it here: https://www.spiritfanfiction.com/historia/italiana-11332029)
> 
> *Btw, I wish I could keep doing the text pic thingy, but I just couldn't upload it here :c
> 
> Tumblr: http://spookyookiekookie.tumblr.com/  
> Twt: @lemonPuddi


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, I'm ba ba ba ba back again.  
> I'm really sorry for the spelling mistakes, don't hesitate to correct me if you feel like it.  
> (http://spookyookiekookie.tumblr.com/)
> 
> *No smut, but some kissing!!!

"Is this bra too flashy?" Roxy says, looking at herself in the huge bedroom mirror.

"Yeah. You should wear the nude one." Jane responds.

The girl grunts in discontent, ripping off her quite transparent shirt and tossing her magenta bra to the floor. She doesn't seem to care about Dirk having full view of her breasts, but Dirk doesn’t seem to care about the girl's nudity. Jane can sense how stressed out he is, they are already two hours late for the annual Peixes Party in which Dirk has zero interest in going.

Jane feels a little jealous; Roxy's breasts were adorable, small, pointy and pinkish. Where hers were huge, heavy and dark. Roxy winks when she catches Jane staring.

"Have you decided if you're going to wear the dress?" Roxy says as she puts on the not so loud bra.

She groans, looking at the garment in her hands. Jane feels comfortable enough wearing the same flowered dress she wore two weeks ago, even though it’s a cold night (she is bringing her leather jacket after all, just in case things get _too_ chilly). However, Roxy had ~~insisted~~ suggested upon she wearing her bought but never used before woollen dress, which, though warm and long-sleeved, was extremely short. Jane didn't feel good about showing her body _that_ much.

"Why don't you try it out? Maybe you'll like it." Roxy gives the final touches to her make-up while glancing at Jane.

"Can y'all speed it up? In this way Jake's going to get there before us." Dirk says over his phone.

"Okay, I'll try." It’s more because of Roxy's insistence than self-will.

Jane chooses to leave the room and change in the bathroom, even if Dirk doesn't care and, honestly, has no interest in Jane's body she still doesn't feel comfortable changing in front of him. Which is stupid and old-fashioned of her. Roxy is bisexual and Jane has no problem changing in front of the girl, why the sudden modesty with Dirk?

The dress barely covers her butt, which is pretty large and the fabric sticks to the shapes of her body. But hey, it is a party full of drunken young adults, she isn't going to be the only one half-naked.

"Alright, you win. I'll use it." She says as soon as she enters the room.

Roxy whistles and gives Jane's ass a slap.

"Is not too much, right?" She asks Dirk, hoping for the boy's honesty. Not that Roxy wasn’t, but to Roxy the less clothes the better.

She can feel his gaze in her direction, his eyes seem to get lost in Jane's thick legs, but she couldn't tell over the boy's glasses. "Nah. You look great."

It's enough for Jane. She and Dirk had similar tastes, at least in certain areas, like clothes and _boys_. But she wouldn't think about that certain _boy_ today. In fact, Jake was out of her mind that night. It was the party of Meenah Peixes, the richest troll in town; apparently, she was related somehow with the Condesce? Jane didn't know how to explain trolls and their kinship properly, she knew Meenah had high blood and was on top of royalty, she and Feferi, but Feferi was younger and kinder than Meenah. Anyway, Meenah was a popular girl, for some reason Jane could not fathom, and her chances of finding every trolls in town at the party was high. Every troll in town meant that Rufioh would probably be there! Not that she was going to Meenah’s party just because of him; Jane would never submit herself to a man. Which, again, was hypocritical of her because she already submit so much because of Jake. Anyway, Rufioh being there was only a bonus of the night.

Not that she had any hope of him being interested in her!

Okay, maybe she carried a little hope. _You never know, right?!_

Jane ends up sitting in the backseat of Dirk's car, as Roxy needed to control the music so the two of them could be spared of the terrible songs Dirk insisted on listening. According to him, the tracks were _ironic_ and _cool_ , but they knew that the playlist belonged to his older brother and Dirk pretended to liked it.

"So," Roxy says, putting something of Tove Lo. "I talked to Sollux and he's going to help us with the _get Jane laid_ plan."

"What? No!"

"Lol, I'm just joking."

"What did I miss?" Dirk says, glancing at Jane in the rear-view mirror.

"Jane's toy boy is going to be at the party, we're putting together a plan for them to get to _know_ each other better." The sexual connotation in what she said was so strong that it would be less shameful if she'd just said _'fuck'_ at once.

"She's obviously joking." Jane says as serious as she could. “Sollux will only help me to approach him. _To talk_."

"Oh." Dirk quietly mutters.

"Aaah, this party is going to be the shit." Roxy yells out, bouncing in the passenger seat.

It's not like Jane didn't want to tell the 'plan' to Dirk or Jake, maybe NOT to Jake since he looked so annoyed last time. But Dirk was so distant from her in the past week, locking himself in his work room and working on god's knows what. Jane visited him three times that week just to make sure the boy had at least something other than cheetos and soda as a meal. Jake was working overtime every day and the boy barely had time to take care of himself, let alone his irresponsible boyfriend. When Jane took time to bring food to Dirk, he just murmured a ‘thank you’ and returned to his work. She thought maybe he was angry with her for some reason she couldn't imagine. But she decided not to stress about it, after all that behaviour wasn't strange of the Strider, and forcing him to open up was worst.

From the corner of the street they can hear the loud music, the house of Peixes (a three story house because the girl was a millionaire) seems still intact and the yard was free of liquor bottles and vomit, even late they should be one of the firsts to arrive. The house lighting is terrible; trolls preferred the dark, although they had no problem living in the sunlight. There are some coloured lights around the house, but it does nothing to illuminate the place.

The three head to the gigantic kitchen, greeting Meenah, who is talking to a blue-eyed troll and pouring a glass of cheap vodka with equally cheap soda. Meenah was as stingy as she was rich.

They settle at the porch, watching those insane enough to be jumping in the pool. That part of town was cold, so cold that Jane’s breath was coming out as smoke.

Jane promised herself she wouldn't overdo with the booze, especially after last time. But Meenah kept pushing up drinks, not just to them, but to all guests she'd come across. And since the three of them weren't getting out of the chairs on the porch (which seemed to be made of straws in the way the material was cutting Jane's thighs), she was aiming at them all night. Jane is in her third cup, in what now appears to be some liquor with a disgusting red soda.

She blinks a couple of times, trying to pay attention to what Roxy is talking about. "Anyway, forked tongues are great," She says, winking at Dirk who is standing in front of them, leaning against the wooden rail.

"His tongue is forked?" Jane slurs, feeling her tongue tingle.

"Not just the tongue." Roxy winks.

Jane only sighs, taking another sip of her disgusting drink. "I miss kissing."

The drink might be disgusting, but the alcohol is doing its job to make her tipsy, slow and a little horny. What wouldn’t she give to kiss someone right now. Anyone! Even Gamzee seemed like a good choice at the moment and he didn't really smell like flowers if you know what I mean.

Roxy opens one of her big-Roxy-smirks and leans toward Jane, bringing her face close to hers. "Wanna do it? For old time's sake?" Roxy says, the girl's breath smells like the sweetness of the drink.

Jane laughs it off and takes another sip of her cup, but Roxy is still on her face. "Are you serious?"

"Why not? Come on! We never kissed. For how long we've been friends now?" She doesn't look drunk, but we are talking about Roxy here, she won't get drunk with three shots of vodka.

Unlike Roxy, Jane is quite tipsy, and Roxy's lips are a matte wine, Jane always liked dark makeup. Roxy takes advantage of her friend's eyes in her mouth and closes their distance.

The girl's lips are soft, but Jane doesn't have time to appreciate them for a long period because Roxy wastes no time in making her way through Jane's mouth with her tongue. Roxy kisses exactly like her personality, a mixture of tongue, nibbles and giggles. She even squeezes one of Jane's breasts making the girl laugh so loud that Roxy has to pull away to avoid Jane’s spit.

Dirk was staring at everything, visibly uncomfortable. By the time Jane recovers her breath, Roxy is already on her feet, jumping on Dirk. Both of them kissed as if it were the most normal thing in the world, different from the girls, Dirk and Roxy kiss is much more serious and sensual. He holds tightly around her waist and her arms are wrapped around his neck. Jane averts her eyes, feeling a little uncomfortable and manages to wipe most of Roxy's lipstick from her mouth.

When she finishes checking her mouth for any signs of the dark lipstick Roxy is staring at her. The girl points at Jane and Dirk with a wicked smile. "It's your turn."

_Oh gosh._ _What now?_ Dirk looks like a statue and Jane can't scan anything from that poker face, she can only imagine he is super uncomfortable. But it would be so rude not to kiss him, after all she just kissed one of her friends why wouldn’t she kiss the other one?

Jane gets up, pulling her dress down trying to cover her legs as much as possible in a sudden moment of modesty. She approaches slowly, uncertain whether he really wanted it or not. When she gets close enough, she looks him in the eyes (at least she hopes she is aiming right, even in that darkness he had refused to take off his shades) and raises her eyebrows trying to understand if she could proceed.

Dirk answers by bringing a cold hand to her face, connecting their lips together. Dirk's lips are as soft as Roxy's, but chapped. If kissing Roxy was fun, kissing Dirk was the complete opposite. Instead of the nibbles and giggles there was one hand clutching on her lower back, squeezing her body with his and the other on her face holding it exactly where he wanted. His tongue didn't ask, but demanded Jane's. He kissed her intensely, with a steady rhythm, leaving her breathless. As he pulls away, she feels stunned, still looking into his face and, honestly, expecting more. But there isn't another, Dirk lets her go, and she takes a step back.

"Wow, is it hot here or is just me?" Roxy says, chuckling and Jane feels her face burn.

She sits down by Roxy's side, covering her face with her hands and muttering. "I can't believe you convinced me to do that. I'll never be the same." Which only makes Roxy laugh even more.

"Have you finished kissing your moirals or do you need a few more minutes?" A tall, skinny troll, about the same height as Dirk, approaches them.

"Sollux!" Roxy exclaims, pulling the troll by the hand and making him fall on her lap. She squeezes him, burying her face in his chest.

"Jeez, how much have you had to drink?" A faint yellowish covers his face and neck. "Thank you for robbing a man from his dignity, Roxy."

"Sollux these are my friends, Jane and Dirk." She says, pointing with her nose at them.

"Nice to meet. Roxy talks a lot about you." Jane smiles at the troll, unable to look away at the duplicate horns.

"Hey!" Dirk murmurs.

Sollux stares at Dirk for a few seconds and turns to Jane. "Oh yeah? She does now?" He gazes at his girlfriend, who was rocking him in her lap.

"Only good things!" Roxy winks at the troll.

"So you're the robot guy?" Sollux asks Dirk.

And... they spend hours talking about robotics and computers and even Roxy was engaging in the conversation. Jane couldn't be more bored. Meenah pushes another cup into her hand. After a few sips Jane's mouth was beginning to go numb.

When Jane sees Jake's face, lost and squinting eyes in search of his friends, she smiles. Finally someone to free her from that torture. She raises her arm, spilling some of the drink into her dress. "Jake!" She calls his name and waves her hand. "Thank God, save me from these nerds." Sollux snorts at her side.

"This is Jake, Dirk's husband."

"Hey, I don't remember saying yes." Jake answers, giving his boyfriend a peck. "But just imagine, Dirk English, sounds really good, doesn't it?"

"What? Fuck no. Obviously, you're the one taking my last name. Jake Strider. Wow, you just got 90% cooler."

Jake frowns his face and Jane can't help and burst into laughter, almost choking on her drink. She should probably stop drinking.

"Oh, I was almost forgetting. JC, you totally have the hots for RN, right? "

She has no idea what the troll is talking about. Is JC supposed to be her (Jane Crocker)?

"What?"

"Rufioh."

"Oh," He had asked a question, hadn't he? "Hmm, yes? Perhaps?"

"Are not you sure?" He smirks deviously. "Oh shit, he's over there! Give me a minute." He hops off Roxy's lap and walks into the house. Jane shouts _'No, wait!'_ , but the troll is already gone.

"God, I think I'm going to throw up out of nervousness."

"Jane, relax!" Roxy lays a hand on Jane's back. "You're not serious, are you?" She suddenly looks worried.

"I'm fine. But aaarg." Jane hides her face in her hands.

About the plan to make Jane get to know Rufioh better, so, she had changed her mind! Jane had zero skills to handle anything social, let alone flirting.

"Hey, Jake and I are going to get some drinks! Don't do anything I wouldn't. "

"You mean don't do anything you would!"

Dirk responds with a smirk and pulls Jake by the hand, squeezing between the crowds.

"Jane, relax!" Roxy says again, placing both hands on Jane's cheeks. "You're a sweetheart, not to mention hot as fuck. He will love you."

Sollux appears suddenly and grabs Jane by the wrist, pulling her into the house. Squeezing against a group of people blocking the path, Sollux takes her to a sofa in which Rufioh is sitting, alone. She feels her stomach protest.

The troll forces her to sit next to Rufioh. The couch is already quite crowded, so the two are so close together that their thighs make contact. Jane is praying not to vomit.

"You already know each other so good luck!" Sollux says before leaving.

Jane feels a thousand times better when she notices that Rufioh is completely brown in the face. She breathes for a moment, trying to find her words. "He's so subtle, isn't he?" Jane starts laughing, letting _'hoo, hoos'_ out and closing her mouth next. But Rufioh just laughs along with her.

"So, doll, how do you know Sollux?"

"Actually Roxy knows him a lot better than I do." Jane hopes she is making clever comments, but in her intoxicated state it's hard to tell whether she is making sense or not. "They both date or something."

"Red?"

"Hm? Excuse me?"

"Nah, forget about it. Trolls romance is kind of complicated for humans."

_Oh no. This is not going well at all!_ Jane takes another sip of her cup nervously.

_Quick, think of something to say._

"So, how do you know Mee-"

"What do you study anyw-?"

Both of them speak at the same time and she cringes with shame. Rufioh laughs uncomfortably and Jane can not feel worse.

"Sorry, I don't really remember what you are majoring at. Something with Gamzee, right? "

Well, even drunk Jane could ~~complaining~~ talk about her major for hours. That's how college students fit in, right? Talking shit about teachers and complaining about the amount of subject they are forced upon to study, not to mention the thousands of seminars, _arg_.

Jane is beginning to have control of the conversation, she even manages to make Rufioh laugh a couple of times and, despite the sharp and sort of scary canines, it melted Jane's heart. Or maybe it’s the alcohol that made everything sound 3 times more charming.

A head appears between the two and Jane drops some more alcohol in her dress. If it continues like this, by the end of the night the soda colouring will be impregnated in the fabric.

"Hey Rufioh," And it is Meenah, leaning from behind the couch and throwing her body between them. "Guess who's here tonight?" The smirk on her face is pure malice as she points with her thumb to a group of trolls and humans.

He stretches his neck, his face twists and he shrugs. "Meenah, you know we broken up."

"Durr, look _who_ is with him." Rufioh seems annoyed, but he looks anyway. His expression changes drastically.

 "Sh*t! Sorry doll, we'll catch up later, eh?! "He casts a look of remorse at Jane and squeezes himself against the crowd toward the group.

Meenah chuckles at Jane's side. "Gurl, so much drama. Glubing love it."

Jane couldn't be more confused, and it shows on her face.

"So," Meenah begins, jumping from behind the sofa and taking Rufioh place. A little more of Jane's drink spills into her dress and she growls in discomfort. "Do you see the troll with long hair that looks like a perverted?" She points straight at him without a shred of shame. "The one with the arrow horns. Yeah, Rufioh's ex." She opens up an even bigger smirk. "Now do you see the troll with hair sticks? In the short dress, looking like a slut? Also Rufioh's ex, the only difference is that she's completely psycho. "

She begins to laugh even more, but Jane only becomes more confused.

"Oh God, this party can't get any better!" Jane raises an eyebrow at Meenah and prepares to ask for explanations before being interrupted.

"Fuck gurl! You were trying to hit that, weren’t yah? Shit. Fuck, sorry! "

"Oh no. Do not worry-"

"Stay here! I'll fix it." She stands up suddenly. "Do you have preferences? Humans? Trolls? Men? Er ... you'll like what I bring to you. Don't leave."

"Meenah, wait!" But it's too late. She practically leaps through the crowd and Jane can only see the tip of the girl's horns.

_Fuck that, flee. Fast!_

And Jane slides through the crowd as fast as she can, almost falling in the process. Anyone would be crazy to stay and face whatever Meenah was planning.

Jane heads straight for the porch, hoping for Roxy to save her. As soon as she puts her feet outside, she turns around. Roxy is in a liplock with Sollux, practically grinding into him.

_Nope._

Then she decides to escape to the upper floors, looking for Jake and Dirk. There was a difference between third wheeling for a couple as old as Dirk and Jake and a fresh out of the oven couple, and the difference is that the first wouldn't have an intense make out session in front of her.

There are fewer people on the second floor and a line that Jane suspects is for the bathroom, speaking of which, she really needs to use one. The third floor is technically restricted, but who obeys rules at a Peixes party? And she hopes it's a good place to hide from Meenah.

She enters a gigantic room and sighs in relief when she finds it empty. As soon as she finishes her needs in the biggest bathroom she's ever laid eyes on (There was an _electric bidet! An electric fricking bidet._ ), she approaches the huge glass sliding door that led to the street's view. The view was beautiful, and she wondered if she would ever have a chance to live in such a big house. _Pff, only in dreams!_ Jane urgently needed a drink, she could feel sobering up, and when Jane sobers up she becomes extremely sleepy.

She can listen to a very familiar goofy laugh. She slides the glass door and sees two tufts of hair, blonde and brunette. _Found it!_ She murmurs to herself and walks to the next room, smaller than the first one. She doesn't waste time looking at the expensive furniture and goes directly to the balcony to meet the two boys.

"What such beauties like you two do alone on such a cold night?" She says, twisting her invisible moustache.

"Oh, Mr. Crocker, ravish me." Dirk places the back of his hand on his forehead and throws his head back.

She giggles, sitting down in front of them, more precisely on her legs because of that damn dress and, _oh_ , Dirk is without his shades, what a miracle.

"Did you see? They have an electric bidet. An electric bidet!" She says, trying to keep the laughs going.

"Fuck yes! I'm going to invade this house every night to enjoy that hot spurt of the gods in my ass." Dirk says with a wide smile, and for Dirk to be smiling that wide he must be very drunk.

"Did you use it?"

"You didn't?"

"I was afraid to do an accidental enema on myself."

"Ah Janey, disgusting." Jake says, wrinkling his nose and sipping on his drink.

"What is this?" She says, reaching for the cup in Jake's hand and taking a sip. A huge mistake. As bare vodka descends through her throat, Jane begins to cough.

"Why are you drinking bare vodka?"

"Because I refuse to put my mouth in that coloured carbonate they call soda. Be a man Jane and chug this shit. "

"Excuse me? I'd rather be a woman and chug this shit! "

"So be it!" Exclaims Jake.

She does, just to prove she can. It was a miracle she hadn't vomited, and she would have if that cup had more than 2 shots of vodka. Jake takes the cup from her hands as she writhes in disgust, feeling the alcohol burn her stomach. "You were a brave woman and I'm proud of you." Jake says, filling the cup again with the stolen vodka from the kitchen.

"I wish I was wearing pants." Her legs were already getting numb; she doesn't have many possible positions without giving the boys in front of her full access to her panties.

Jake, being the gentleman he tries to be, takes off the dark blue shirt he wore over his undershirt and hands it over to Jane. That accepts by muttering a 'thank you'.

"I thought you were going to be talking to _Rufioh_ all night." Jake twists his nose as he says the name of the troll. At other times, Jane would find it silly, but now it just annoyed her.

"Problems with the ex."

"Oh, drama. Do tell." Says Dirk.

"Meenah who said that so believe cautiously. He have this psycho ex who was talking to the most current ex? Something like that. Meh, things weren't going so well. My social skills are super rusty." She takes the cup from Jake's hand and takes another sip.

"I think your social skills are great!" Jake exclaims, and by the way, the boy's eyes are half open and red she knew he no longer knew who he was. Dirk isn't much better either, his neck is a beautiful reddish colour. "You're amazing, Janey." Jake lets go, and Jane can't hold the silly grin on her face. _Damn it Jake!_ Does he need to be so charming even drunk?

The cup of vodka continued to pass in the hand of the three, and since Jane was already dizzy, it didn’t take long before she’s totally wasted. How did those two take that amount of alcohol that easily?

"So, what were you doing while I was gone?"

Dirk drowns in his drink, coughing painfully. Now his whole face is a reddish colour. "Dude, you missed it," He says hoarsely. "There was a smooch party. I can't believe you missed the party and the smooches! "

"What?"

Jane feels somewhat reluctant in telling. Wouldn't he get mad? Probably not, and if he does get mad it's a problem for sober Jane to fix. "Roxy made the three of us kiss"

" _'Made_ ,'" Dirk makes quotation marks with his fingers. "Roxy started and the rest went with the flow."

"Oh man, I can't believe it! Why do I always lose the cool stuff? I want smooches too!" Jake says, pouting.

"You haven't lost much. You already know how Dirk kisses!"

"Hey, don't sweat it. You can kiss Roxy later and Jane is available right in front of you." Dirk points his chin at Jane, who even drunk was panicking.

_They're joking, right?_

However, Jake looks at her and raises his eyebrows, his bucked teeth exposed in a not so innocent smile. Jane takes another sip of the drink and avoids Jake's eyes, expecting them to laugh it off and confirm that it's just a joke.

"Hey, don't leave me hanging Jane!" Jake says. When the girl's eyes focus on him he had a ridiculous pout on his face.

"Really?" She even looks at Dirk to confirm, but he looks as excited for it as the one who would receive the kiss.

Jake nods.

_Fuck it._

She leans over, holding firmly on Jake's thighs and waiting for the boy to approach her. Which he does and, _wow_ , kissing Jake is nothing like Jane had imagined, it's so much better! It is almost like kissing Dirk, after all the two are dating for centuries, but less dominant and with less tongue. He's so hot and smells so good, so Jake. When he sucks her bottom lip she can't help the moan that came out from her throat.

She pulls away by pushing Jake's shoulders; his hands are holding tightly around her hips. Jane's eyes fall on Dirk, expecting a negative reaction, even drunk her stomach turned just by thinking about how much she was hurting him. However, Dirk response is to lean toward Jake, holding the boy's jaw and locking their lips together. Okay, this is getting weirder by the second. Again Jane tries to pull away, which is difficult considering how light-headed she is. Jake pulls her closer, wrapping his arms around the girl's waist. Now she has a close-up of the two, and Jake was nibbling enthusiastically on Dirk's bottom lip.

It’s intimate, too intimate and Jane feels guilty, as if being there was wrong. At the same time, she isn't able to take her eyes off them. Dirk peeks through narrow eyes; the boy's pale hand descends against Jake's abdomen, pausing between their groins. She feels the back of his hand making contact with the material of her panties. She stiffens. _Was that really happening?_

Dirk breaks the kiss and comes closer to Jane, kissing her gently, almost as if he knew she was having a mini panic attack. Jake's hot hands now slide down Jane's bare thighs and the guilt turns into _other things_. Dirk moves his mouth to her neck and before she can even catch her breath Jake replaces Dirk, kissing her now much more sloppier.

There are too many mouths on Jane and her neck is pretty sensitive, she grips tightly on Jake's shirt, her hands trembling with hyper stimulation. This isn't supposed to be happening, people don't kiss their friends like that. I mean, kissing your friends from time to time was acceptable, even if it's embarrassing, but that was already going beyond limits. How is she going to face them afterward? What if they went further than kissing, and a persistent hand she was avoiding at all costs to press against? Dirk doesn't even like what she has in the middle of her legs!

"Wait! Hold on." Jake stops immediately, but Dirk keeps nibbling on her neck.

Jane lifts up sharply, her heart pounding against her ribs and she feels an inexplicable shame. "Hoo hoo, should I, hm, look for Roxy?" Her eyes are everywhere except on the two and she is almost certain that her dress is revealing more than she wanted, but she can only think of getting away.

She walks out of the room, tripping over Jake's legs and nearly falling. Behind her, the boys exclaimed something, but Jane's mind is fuzzy with alcohol and shame.

Even on that cold, noisy night all she felt was the sweat running down her back and her heart pulsing so hard she could feel it all over her body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This got bigger than I had planned :^o
> 
> Also, there will be smut in this fic and we are almost getting there. You've been warned!!!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> English is hard, jeez. Sorry for any mistakes. Hope you enjoy this chapter :^)

There is a pool of saliva underneath her face, yet Jane prefers to drown in her own saliva rather than getting up. Her head throbs, her stomach protest, and her mouth tastes like death. For a second she wonders where she is, but she would recognize that old Nick Offerman poster anywhere. She would never ever throw that treasure away!

All events from last night flash through her mind. Her stomach growls, not with hunger, but with pain and regret. She shouldn't have drunk so much and most importantly, she shouldn't have used her tongue on her friends as if she were on an ice cream tasting. Were the boys feeling as regretful as she was? She just hopes things won’t get uncomfortable between them again. Especially after all she went through to make things go back to normal.

Her hands pat the mattress beside the pillow looking for her phone. _Oh no._ Where had she put her phone? And the worst of all, Jane is almost certain to have returned home without telling her friends.

_Oh no._

Her memory is still shuffled; she remembers having picked up an uber and headed home. Now, how is she in her pajamas and where are her things still is a mystery. For some reason her dress is thrown in the middle of the hall. Her glasses thrown over the plastic plant, because neither of the girls had the skills (cof cof laziness) to care for plants. She heads to the bathroom, avoiding looking at her own reflection, yet at a glance she can perceive her pallor and the two dark bags under her eyes.

It's a miracle she doesn't feel like throwing up; yet no signs of the phone in the bathroom. The phone wasn’t anywhere in the apartment, Jane even looked inside the fridge and the microwave.

The front door opens before Jane begins to despair.

"Nepeta? Have you seen my phone?" The troll's skin was shiny with sweat.

"Oh? No. Why- _Human Jesus_ , Jane! Are you okay?" Nepeta's green eyes glows with concern.

A _'yeah'_ almost came out of Jane's mouth, but what would she gain by lying? "No, but it's my own fault, I drank too much. And I think I lost my phone. "

"Why do humans enjoy to intoxicate themselves so much?" Jane closes her mouth about trolls doing the same thing, the only difference being that instead of alcohol they used sugar.

"Can I use your phone?"

"Of course! Your friends called yesterday asking where you were."

_Oh._

"Thank you!"

"Don’t mention it!" She smiles cheerfully. Nepeta did impossible things, like looking adorable while dripping in sweat, possible.

Nepeta had her friends’ phone number, and Jane had Nepeta's. It was a great dynamic; you never know when one of them would get into trouble. Better safe than sorry. There was a call from Roxy and two from Jake; she chooses to call Roxy first.

It was a rare thing to witness Roxy angry and that was one of those rare times. The blonde's voice was a mixture of high-pitches and growls, pretty scary. Even her father didn't talk to her like that. She avoided telling all the details of the evening, especially the part where the three of them exchange saliva as if it were pogs, and said she got an uber because she was feeling sick. Yes, it was a tattered excuse, and Roxy would have known if she wasn't too busy spitting fire. After a few apologies (13 apologies, but who was counting?), Roxy calmed down and told Jane to never do that to her again.

Roxy didn't know the whereabouts of her phone, so that was still a mystery. Maybe she should retrace her steps? She shrugs; Jane has never been much of a phone person anyway. She sends a quick message to Jake, affirming that she was well. Right after the phone rings. Well, that was news!

"Hello?"

" _Jesus christofer kringlefucker, Jane!_ ”

"I know, sorry. I ended up forgetting to tell that I had come home. Besides, I have no idea where my phone is."

_"It's with us, you forgot on the back of the car. Gosh, Jane, we were so worried."_

Jane's stomach roars in discomfort and guilt, among other things, but she couldn't use the bathroom until Jake hang up. Jane doesn't take risks when it comes to diarrhea.

"I'm really sorry, Jake. I didn't want to make you guys worry."

_"Dirk almost forced us to circle the town looking for you, but your roommate told us that you were home."_

"Is he upset?" All Jane did not needed was Dirk's coldness.

_"Hm, I don't think so. I don't know, he's kind of quiet. You know how he is."_

Then she remembers last night, especially the part where she kissed Dirk’s boyfriend in from of him (and vice versa). She takes a finger to her mouth and pulls a cuticle with her teeth, making the skin bleed.

"Hm." She didn't know what to say, her heart was beating fast and all she wanted to do was throw the phone out the window and take refuge in her room.

_"I can pass by the campus tomorrow to deliver your phone. Unless you want to pick it up today."_

"No, no, tomorrow is great! Thank you, Jake. I'm going to, um, go, Nepeta needs to use her phone. "

_"Okey doke."_

She hangs up, bringing her bloody finger to her mouth. It's a lie, Nepeta is in the shower, by the sound of the water echoing through the apartment. Jane wasn't in the mood to face Jake at that moment, or either of the boys, really. She sits on the couch, hugging her stomach and feeling the sickness spread across her abdomen.

Everything was going so well. No, for a matter of fact it was going perfect! She had achieved what she wanted the most, returning to the old friendship she had with her friends, and in a single night, everything went downhill. It goes without saying that Jane was blaming herself for what happened. If only she hadn't taken the first step. If only she hadn't stayed with them. If only she hadn't looked for them in the first place. Those kisses, _those mistakes_ , could have been avoided and everything would continue exactly as she wanted.

Tears are forming in her eyes and her heart is racing way too fast. _Easy, Jane, you don't even know if Dirk is really mad at you!_ It echoed through her mind. Yeah, maybe he's just hung over, after all, he had drunk a lot. And maybe he was upset that she went home without warning. _Yes. It's a logical explanation._ Besides, did Jake seem annoyed? No! He sounded like the same Jake as always. Yes! She had no reason to despair.

_As if it were easy not to despair._

___

 

After the alcohol got out of her system and recovering all the lost sleep, Jane felt much better. Her mind still refused to forget what had happened, and the possible consequences that might occur, but at least she could move without feeling that unbearable pressure in the head.

Jane's poor fingers are already raw, anything that gets her attention away from the boys was enough to relieve her anxiety, and in that game who suffered were her poor cuticles.

"Hey, lil mama." The troll sits beside her, tall and extremely high.

"Good morning." She says, her eyes don't leave the campus entrance, paying attention to any boy with an outside tan, black hair and rectangular glasses.

"You're not going to class?" He looks worried, strangely adorable.

"Yes I will! I'm waiting for Jake, he has my phone.”

"Oh!" He looks at his own fingers, gazing his yellow, pointed nails. "Do you want me to wait with you, sis?"

She giggles. "He's already coming, you can go ahead. We'll meet there."

Gamzee smiles back, holding his bag on his thin shoulder. However, he doesn't leave. "Are you okay, Jane?"

He catches her by surprise. "Um, yes? Do not worry, I'm fine."

The troll forces on a smile and Jane feels bad. He says goodbye, Jane watches him walking away and _God why today?_ Why does she have to feel like she's committed a crime today of all days?

"Howdy!" She feels something big and hot on her side and there he is. His hair was damp and smelled like he just gotten out of the shower.

She was able to maintain eye contact for a whole 5 seconds, which was already a lot considering what happened less than two days ago. Jane chooses to look at the drawing on Jake's shirt, a blue alien lady, on other days she would be rolling her eyes. "Hey Jake."

"How are you? You have no idea, I puked so much on Sunday, I thought I was going to barf my guts out." The same smile, to which Jane was so acquainted, is on the boy's face. His front teeth covering a small part of his lower lip. _Doesn't he remember?_

"I'm fine," She says on the automatic, but that was far from the true. "Actually, I feel kind of bad about what happened." She had to say.

Jake's smile dropped.

"Oh."

"Dirk is upset because of me, isn't he?"

"What? No! I mean, he's been quiet ever since... "

"I knew it was my fault." She rested her elbows on her knees, burying her face in her palms.

"Janey."

She feels a warm hand on her back, her body stiffens and the hand disappears. Jane had nothing against the touch of her friends; but was Jake still her friend? There she was, catastrophizing things again.

"It's not your fault Jane, we were all drunk. Um," He looks lost; he opens his mouth a few times, not knowing what to say. "I mean, come one, you even kissed Roxy, didn't you? No one is upset with you. "

The guilt doesn't disappear, much less eases, Jake wasn't the best at cheering, but he was trying and it was enough for Jane. The girl's hand meets Jake's. "Thank you, Jake. I think I'll pass by your place to see how he is. "

"Yeah! Do that. I'm sure he'll confirm what I am saying." He squeezes Jane's hand. "We should all get together and watch some movies!" He opens another smile, appearing to be excited (or faking very well that reaction). "We can open those bottles of wine I've- on second thought, let's have some good old soda."

The laughter that comes out of Jane is sincere. His intentions are good, even if he is somewhat naive. That's why it was so hard to forget Jake, or take the courage to do so. If she could hate him it would be easier, but it was impossible to hate Jake English.

"I should probably go to my class, I'm," She checks her phone (charged because those two were sweethearts). "oh boy, very late, hoo hoo."

"Don't let me get on your way. Please go ahead, madam!" He winks and gets up with her.

"Well, see you soon the-" Her voice is cut out by Jake's thick arms around her, all those years of manual labour gave the boy quite the muscle mass, he always built muscles easily. But she wasn't thinking about the amount of muscle in Jake's body, was she? Maybe a _little_ bit. Jane always exchanged affection with her friends, sometimes Roxy, never Dirk, but Jake? Jake was never someone who initiative that kind of contact.

He hugs her so tightly, crushing Jane's head against his neck, that even the girl's glasses crooked on her face. Her face, her body, were burning with embarrassment, yet she found the strength to return that strange, unusual hug.

"See you soon, Janey. Hehe." And he heads off campus.

_No, I won't get into my head._ Jane decides, heading towards her block and ignoring her racing heart against her ribs.

___

 

There was a rule that Jane applied for herself recently, she would face all her problems right away, otherwise, it would turn into a giant snowball and it would get even worse. Jane would no longer run away from things that made her anxious, especially if those things were her friends. Thus, before knocking on the boys apartment door she takes a deep breath, filling her diaphragm.

No one answers, which isn't abnormal. She opens the door, which is unlocked, again, nothing unusual. Knowing Dirk well he probably installed security cameras and alarms, or something worse and more violent. There were certain things Dirk built that Jane preferred not to know about. Jane was far from being a violent person, or liking anything close to violence. Except her thriller movies. _Hey_ , most of those bad guys deserved the fist of Miss. Justice, and by fist she means something completely metaphorical, there's something called police brutality and it's illegal!

"Dirk?"

No answers, however Jane can hear the loud noise of a drill in the room where Dirk works on his robots. She left the shopping bags in their kitchen, her plan was to make dinner for the two boys, as both of them had no problem living on take outs and frozen food. _Gosh, I really am their grandmother!_ Jane chuckles by herself.

The apartment is in its usual mess, she dodges from a pairs of sneakers in the middle of the hallway, stopping in front of the door. Dirk is concentrating on a piece of metal? iron? Jane can't say. His wife beater is covered with oil and sweat. As soon as he stops using the tool, silence spreads through the room.

She opens her mouth. "Your neighbours must be fond of you."

She must have caught him by surprise, because the boy's back goes stiff and he turns toward her quickly. "Oh, hey Jane."

His seriousness only makes her even more nervous. She breathes again with her diaphragm, keeping the smile on her face. "How are you doing?" Jane leans against a table, keeping some distance from Dirk who is kneeling on the floor.

"Meh, well." He goes back to using the drill on what he's working on and all of Jane's confidence drops. Dirk could be a hell of a jerk when he wanted to.

She swallows the lump in her throat and bites down hard on her lip. No, she wouldn't give up so easily. Even if Dirk was being difficult and this talk could result in an ugly argument she wouldn't run away. Jane didn't run anymore!

She persists, leaning against the table, biting her cuticles and watching the boy. Eventually he would have to stop! It wasn't long before Dirk sets the drill aside and gets up, yielding to Jane's wishes. He's still too proud to start any kind of conversation, but he had move over and is handling some papers across the table as far away from Jane as possible. In the Strider's language that meant: _'I'm open to the conversation you want to have, even if it's against my will.'_

"I think we should talk."

"About?" He says, his attention still on the papers.

"What happened at the party..."

"We have nothing to talk about."

Jane's lips are already raw from so much nibbling and Dirk was not helping in the situation at all. Damn it, why was he so difficult to deal with?

"You are upset."

"Why would I be?" This time he's looking at Jane. She can see dark circles under his glasses.

Jane brings her hands to her eyes, rubbing them. "Dirk, please. I'm really sorry for what happened. I don't want you to be mad at me because of it. "

"But I’m not."

"Dirk!"

He sighs, holding tightly on the edge of the table. "What do you want me to say? Yes, I'm annoyed because you kissed Jake, but talking about it will change what happened?"

Jane goes cold.

"Dirk, I feel awful about that. I'm really sorry. Damn, I know I screwed up, but please don't stop talking to me." She bites her lip with even more force, hoping to hold back tears.

"Shit, Jane. No! It's not your fault. Fuck, I'm the biggest douche in the universe; I don't know why you still talk to me, honestly." The boy's joints began to whiten from the strength he was putting on the table. "I was there and, fuck, I even encouraged both of you and what am I doing? Blaming you, because I'm an asshole.

Dirk's voice begins to fail; Jane has never heard Dirk's voice fail. Suddenly she doesn't know what to do. "Dirk." Slowly she approaches him.

"No! Just listen. The truth is that I'm an extremely selfish person, all this time I was afraid Jake would return your feelings, so I approached you to make sure it didn't happen. I forced you to confess just to clear my doubts, just as I forced Jake to go out with me. And guess what, I was right from the start, he likes you as much as you like him. And what am I doing? Taking out on you. "

Jane takes a hand to the boy's arm; he is colder than usual.

"I know I should respect Jake's decision, but I can't. And now I'm ruining his life and yours."

"The only life you're ruining is yours Strider. Jake loves you; he always loved you! "

"Pff, yeah, it's only because I-"

"NO!" This time he looks at her. "Jake always loved you, it was not because you made him love you, it was simply because you are an incredible person and he saw that. I don't know if Jake really likes me or not, and honestly, I don't care anymore, I actually stopped caring for a long time. I'm not going to be with Jake, not only because I don't have this purpose, but because I would never, ever, do anything that could hurt you. "

Jane places her palm on his cheek. "I don't know what's going on in your hollow head, but the only thing you've been to me is a helpful friend! You have every right to be jealous, that doesn't make you a monster. And Dirk, no matter what, I'll always love you. "

He approaches and Jane opens her arms, ready to give him the hug he clearly needed. However, instead of burying his face in Jane's friendly shoulder he cuts off the distance of the two, kissing her. He doesn't kiss her like the last few times, it's just a touch of lips, where Jane's lower lip fits perfectly into his. It's enough to leave her unable to speak, let alone think. She freezes, and even with her hands on the boy's face, she cann't do anything but face the dark of his shades. As he withdraw, he buries his face in the curve of her neck, hugging her gently.

Jane can feel her own pulse racing in the boy's skin, and if he had noticed, he said nothing. Dirk just stayed in her arms, his body relaxed and his breathing calm. Jane's will was to push him and ask what that was, why he kissed her just when they were both so vulnerable. Why did he kiss her at all? But she still has a remnant of self-control within herself and Dirk has progressed so much, he has opened up to her in a way that Jane never expected.

In this way, she slaps lightly on the boy's back and whispers silently. "You should take a nap."

"Not sleepy."

"When was the last time you slept?"

He responds with silence. Then Jane pulls away, holding him by the wrist and leading him into the bedroom. There were hurdles of jeans and t-shirts on the floor in which she was careful to avoid. As Dirk sits on the bed, she unfolds the mess that was the blanket.

"Take off your shirt." Jane says.

He raises an eyebrow and she rolls her eyes. "Take a shower when you wake up." She throws a clean shirt for Dirk, who dresses without protest. Jane is careful not to look at the boy, she still feels extremely uncomfortable, but Jane always knew how to pretend. At least that's what she believed.

The boy is already lying down, watching Jane pick up the clothes off the floor. She places the clothes in a safe pile out of the way. "And change your sheets too."

"Yes, mom."

It makes her smile involuntarily. He holds her hand. "Don't leave."

"I won't. Who else is going to make sure you eat actual food if not me?" Jane holds the boy's hand in hers, stroking the back of that pale hand on her fingers. She loosens it when she feels Dirk tensing.

He had open up so much today that it was weird it took this long for him to bottle it up again.

It seemed that the basis of her friendship with Dirk was to struggle in getting into any breach that appeared in his heart.

"Go to sleep. I'll be in the kitchen." He nods and turns on his side.

 

Fortunately the table holds Jane's weight as she leans on, throwing all her weight into the wood. It had been the most exhausting conversation she had ever had, perhaps even more than her confession to Jake. She chugs two glasses of water and begins to prepare dinner, chicken with potatoes seemed to be appropriate enough for someone who is forcing a dinner to two people without healthy habits. Maybe she could force a salad on both of them too.

Focusing on cooking was a great way to ignore everything she just dealt with. And she really didn't want to keep thinking about it. On one side, it was great because Dirk was finally beginning to trust her and God knows how difficult it was to make that boy talk about his feelings. At these times, she would like to congratulate Jake and ask how he dealt with the blonde on a daily basis. On the other side was what she IS NOT THINKING ABOUT...

She rubs her eyes with her fingers. That sort of thing don't happen to quiet girls like Jane. Is this an episode of Gossip Girls? Come to think of it, Jane was the only one struggling to maintain a certain level of normality. She was struggling to pretend that the last days' events never existed. Now the question was why did the two of them insist on making things worse? _Maybe I'm doing something wrong?_ Jane finds herself reasoning. Maybe if she took a break from them things would return to normal, even if it were against her will. _Am I so toxic that my presence itself only attracts chaos?_ That thought only hurt her even more. Luckily, she listens to the front door opening, ceasing those self-sabotage thoughts.

"Jane?" She hears the low pitched in Jake's voice, as he stops by the kitchen door a smile opens on his lips. "By the smell it could only be you, hehe."

He throws his backpack from the kitchen, the bag bounces on the sofa and falls on the floor. Then he drags a chair, resting his elbows on the table. "Why do you keep making food for- Jane? It's everything alright?"

Was the stress on her face so obvious? It would be best to respond positively and continue ignoring the topic, but Jane is so shaken that she can't control her mouth. “No, it’s not. Why does he think you like me?

She can see the exact moment Jake stops breathing. "I," he stutters a few times until he is able to speaks. "It's not like that. I can explain!"

"Please, do." The nervousness on his face is visible.

The dark skin of Jake's face becomes even darker. "I like you-"

"Don't you dare."

"No, listen! It's not like what you're thinking, I love Dirk, I've always loved him and always will. But lately some things have bothered me,”

He whispers, almost inaudibly. " _about you._ "

_He's joking, right?_ He could only be. Now everything but guilt went through Jane, she seriously considered pouring the contents of that boiling pan into his face.

"What do you mean by ‘ _bothered’_?"

"It's just that, and I know this is extremely selfish of me, but I feel weird when you go out with other people."

"And what do you expects me to do, Jake? Should I stop meeting new people because you feel uncomfortable?"

Jake's eyes go wet. "Why do I think you two are blaming this all on me? Dirk also talks about you." He shut up, seeming to have said too much.

_What?_

"What did he talk about?"

"I shouldn't. Darn it, I've said too much already. He also gets annoyed and, well, I think he likes you too, in a way." His ears were completely red. Jane is about to freak out.

She runs her hands through her hair, pulling the strands in the process. "I don't know how to handle this." Jane stares at the boy, as if he's going to tell her what to do. "I feel like I'm part of the problem, should I keep my distance from you two? Or-"

"NO! Jane, I'm so sorry," Heavy tears come from Jake's eyes. "I'm such a selfish person; you do not deserve to be going through this." Now he was sobbing heavily, which breaks Jane's heart.

"Oh Jake, please don't cry." She hesitates, was it a good idea to comfort him? Even more after all he said.

However, Jane can't resist the boy's tears and she buries his face in her chest. "It's okay, we'll talk about this and everything will be fine. We've been friends for so long; it's not going to be this silly thing that will break us apart." She wipes the tears from his face, comforting the second person of the day. Maybe Roxy will come to her house later in need of a friendly shoulder too.

Jake wraps his arms around Jane's waist and sobs against her chest, murmuring _'sorry'._ It was hard not to feel like a monster after making Jake cry, even when clearly it was not her fault. Jane couldn't stop thinking that if Roxy was in her place she would handle the situation so much better. Probably using some kind of reverse psychology suggesting to the three of them to _'take off their pants and get it over with'_ only to scare them off. But Jane could never do something like that.

Her phone vibrates in her pocket; she pulls away from Jake and answers after seeing that the call is from her father. Which is strange, since the man usually calls her only on Fridays.

"Hey, Dad, is something wrong?"

_"Jane!"_ He seems, alarmed? _"Where are you? It's everything alright?"_

“What? I'm fine, I'm at Dirk and Jake's house. What happened?"

_"Someone broke into your apartment."_

_Oh shucks._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is the most cliché end you ever saw, but guess what? I don’t feel ashamed at all HAHAHAHA
> 
> [Tumblr](http://spookyookiekookie.tumblr.com/)   
>  [Twitter](https://twitter.com/lemonPuddi)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe I actually was able to keep translating this.
> 
> *I'm really sorry for any grammar mistakes (as you know I don't have a beta :c)

"Thank God you're okay!" Hearing the troll's voice on the other end of the line is enough to calm Jane down, even though she knew the person who broke into their apartment would have suffered a lot more if Nepeta was there at the time.

 _"Yes! I'm relieved you weren't at home either, Jane!"_ Jane can hear an extremely low voice on the other end of the line, despite not understanding what is being said. " _Shush Equius. Sorry, hehe. Equius wants to know if you have any clue about who might have done it, but I understand if you're too startle to talk."_

"No, I'm fine, really!"

She wonders for a moment, but Jane can't imagine who could have done such a thing, it wasn't like she had any enemies. Jane considers it to be an attempted robbery, even though the landlord having said that the person took nothing. "Does he thinks it was personal?"

The phone almost falls from her hand as Jake drives over a hole in the road. He mutters an apology before turning his attention back to the traffic.

_"Weren't you attacked by a guy nearly a month ago?"_

"Oh." She glances at Dirk who is in the backseat tapping furiously into his phone. "Yeah, but why would he know where I live?"

"He? He who?" Jake says.

She covers the phone with her hand. "Do you remember what happened at that bar? The last time we went out?"

"He knows where you live!?" Jake says, a little too loud. From the rear-view, Dirk's gaze burns her.

"Of course not."

"He doesn't know where I live, at least I never told him." She says back to Nepeta.

_"Maybe he followed you?"_

"Arg, you're scaring me."

 _"Sorry!"_ Jane can almost see the troll frowning with guilt. _"Let's not jump to conclusions."_ But Nepeta don't sound convinced.

"Anyway, I'm going there now so you don't have to worry! Maybe you should stay with your friend today. "

_"Yes. And you too, Jane! "_

She hasn't thought of that! It isn't a good idea for Jane to stay in an apartment that had just been invaded.

Jake parks, further ahead they see a police car and she imagines that it had been the work of Mr. Garcia, the landlord. She makes a mental note to thank the man as soon as she meets him.

There are two police officers in her house talking to Mr. Garcia. As soon as the older man looks at Jane, he calms down. "Jane! Thank goodness, you're okay! How's your colleague?"

"Don't worry, she's fine. She's at a friend's house." She stares at the two cops, not knowing what to do.

"Are you the resident of this place?" The taller cop spoke, looking down to Jane.

"Um, yes. One of them."

"From what we noticed nothing of value was taken. Do you possess something of value that the subject may have tried to steal? Some jewel or inheritance."

"No? No!"

"Um, very strange." This time the short cop says, seeming friendlier. "Do you or your friend have any enemies? Or someone who wants to do some harm to you?"

Jane bites her lips. Technically, there's no proof that _he_ really is responsible for this mess. It’s not as if she has any evidence to incriminate him.

"Hey, so," Dirk interrupts, stopping by Jane's side. "Yes, she has an _'enemy'_." He literally makes quotation marks with his fingers. "There was this guy who drugged her and tried to force her into his car. I stopped him before he could do anything. What's the name of the guy, Jane? "

"Harold."

"Yeah, that! She even knows where he works."

"Well, unfortunately we have no evidence to do an arrest warrant."

"So, why the fuck are you asking her if she got any enemies if you're not going to do anything about it?"

_Dirk, you idiot._

Jane grabs the boy by the biceps, piercing him with her nails as hard as she can, not even a grunt of pain comes out of him. "Hoo, do not mind him, he hasn't been sleeping well." She practically begs the two police officers, who weren't happy at all now. Jane could swear that the tall one was getting ready to confront Dirk. "Anyway, I'm so grateful for your service, sirs."

Both of cops seem to be more relaxed which was good. Dirk may just has lost his mind, or he really wants to be arrested for disrespecting an officer.

Mr. Garcia continues to talk to the two police officers as the three teens explore the rest of the apartment. At first glance, it doesn't seem that there's something wrong with the place, except for a broken vase and a few footprints on the floor. Nepeta's room is almost untouched. But as soon as they arrive in Jane's room, chaos is everywhere. There's nothing missing, however, all Jane's belongings are ruined, her clothes are on the floor, torn apart, the little makeup she had is broken, her computer on the ground, shattered.

If Jane had any doubts before, now she's sure. It's him who had destroyed her things and the worst of all, he knows where she lives. Jane can only suppose this is some kind of warning. Because if he really wanted to do something to Jane, he would wait for her to come home. Unless he has some mental disorder, which Jane is discarding, after all she had talked to him and he seemed absolutely 'normal'. Although, not all mental illness are possible to perceive, several symptoms manifest from time to time or with certain triggers. He may also be taking some kind of dru-

"You're pretending to be a detective again, aren't you?" Jake interrupts her line of reasoning. Strangely enough, Jake is angry with her, and not Dirk like usual. "Jane, this is serious. You could be here at the time."

Out of the corner of her eyes, Jane sees Dirk crouched, staring at something. She turns to Jake. "If he wanted to do something to me, why didn't he waited for me at home?"

"Jane!"

"Guys..." In Dirk's hands is a crumpled piece of paper. There's something written in red.

**_'Stay away, cow.'_ **

"Um," She murmurs, thinking deeply. Okay, maybe Jake's right, this is a serious circumstance! In Jane's defence, she's a bit scared, but the suspense of the situation intrigues her more than it scares her.

"Jesus friggin’ Christ on a pogo stick. This is very serious, Janey." Jake is the most startled among the three. Despite the boy's appearance, he was always the most fearful of the four.

"What do you think?" She turns to Dirk.

"You already know what I think. It's him."

"Yes, it is my suspicion. However, I believe we'd better investigate further."

A heavy, weary sigh comes out of Dirk. "Jane, we've talked about this already! You will not chase him like a cocaine doped Sherlock Holmes. "

Then a tangle of blond hair enters Jane's bedroom, whistling loudly. "Wow, he certainly did a mess." It’s Roxy. Usually the girl doesn’t leave the house without a good coat of makeup; Jane isn't used to see those dark bags under her eyes. "What did I miss?" She looks from Dirk to Jane.

"She wants to Scooby Doo the rapist's ass." Jane gives him an annoyed look.

"Janey!" Roxy says, an almost imperceptible smile on her lips. "You should be more careful with this guy, Rick?"

"Harold."

"That! He doesn't seem like he's all there." Roxy squeeze the girl in her arms.

Mr. Garcia stops at the door, looking exhausted. "Well, there's not much to do! Can you stay at someone's house, Jane?"

Before Jane could answer, Roxy says excitedly. "She is with me."

"Good, I feel relieved. Sorry for what happened." The man seems genuinely guilty.

Mr. Garcia and Jane's father were college friends, which is why the man seemed so guilty about the situation. Jane was only able to move to this city because the man made one of his apartments affordable to the girl. Adding this with the share rent with Nepeta, Jane had almost no residence costs. That’s precisely why she could live so comfortably, but those days were coming to an end. Which wasn't all bad, after all the girl was starting to feel pressured to get a job.

"It's not your fault Mr. Garcia. People like that will always exist, regardless of what we do. Thank you so much for worrying and calling the police. "

"Don't mention it! Well, I'm heading back home." He stretches his neck with a soft crack. "Be careful, Jane. If anything happens, don't hesitate to call! "

"Of course! Thank you again, Mr. Garcia. "

And then the whole picture hits Jane, not that she hasn't been aware before, and she's a little shaken! But there are those little things, like, what she's going to wear now? Plus, all the college papers and presentation were in her computer, by the way the machine is splintered to the ground Jane doubts she'll be able to retrieve anything. She rubs her temples, trying to contain the cry of frustration bubbling in her throat.

"Jeez, what a stressful day." She murmurs.

Roxy rubs one of her arms. "Let's go home, you need to rest." Jane nods in agreement.

___

 

Fortunately, Roxy has enough clothes to fit Jane, and when I say clothes, I say shirts. The girl will have to figure it out what to do regarding underwear and other hygiene products that Harold so kindly dumped on the floor of her room. Jane will have to buy at least the essentials to survive, such as panties and jeans. Which’s all she can afford at the moment.

The girl is so stressed out that she can't help it and vomits all the events of the last days on Roxy, figuratively. She was avoiding sharing what had happened with Dirk and Jake because the last thing Jane wanted was to discuss the complicated relationship she was having with the two boys. And Jane didn't rule out the possibility of Roxy confronting the two about it, after all Roxy could be overprotective when she wanted to. However, the blonde's reaction was only to open a strange smile.

"So, let me get this straight," She says, leaning against the headboard and hugging her pillow. "After you kissed them, more than once by the way, they started acting weird," Roxy narrows her pink eyes, looking for any kind of reaction on Jane's face. "And by strange, you mean Jake saying he likes you and Dirk kissing you."

"If you put it that way it sounds a little suggestive."

"Jane, it's impossible to be more suggestive than that." Roxy lets out a laugh with the pout that forms on Jane's lips. "Wait! You really don't get it?"

"What?"

"I don't know; I'm afraid I'll ruin everything if I tell you."

" _What?!_ "

"You know, you're going to have more fun if you find out for yourself." She lets out another laugh and Jane feels the anger bubbling in her chest. "And you say Jake is the slow one of the group."

"Arrg, you're annoying."

Jane turns her back to Roxy as far as possible she can get, which only makes her laugh even more and hug the girl from behind.

"Will you be fine?"

"I guess. I'm more annoyed than scared to be honest. I mean, even though he's directing these attacks to me, it doesn't only affect me. Do you understand? "

"Just be careful, Jane."

"I will."

___

 

"Yes dad, I'm fine! Really! Roxy doesn't care and I can't just leave my classes and go back home." Deep down Jane feels guilty for making her dad worry so much. He's somewhat right, after all, that was a threat, but Jane didn't want to stop her life now, especially with so many unresolved things. And she was doing so well in her classes, she wouldn't accept defeat and run away so easy!

He insists on depositing more money into Jane's account, which the girl refuses right away. Her father was only supporting her in another town because his friend was kind enough to charge half the rent. He would certainly not be able to help her financially in a new apartment. Precisely for this reason, she doesn't tell him that she needed clothing and other things.

The situation was still surreal, it's hard to believe something like that would happen to cautious people like Jane. The anger the girl felt became more intense when she needed to do little things that reminded her of what had happened, such as reporting to the police station that in the end wouldn't solve anything since there wasn't enough evidence to incriminate the man. Even the fact that she had to go after a pair of jeans and some shirts made her mad. Why does she have to go through hell when she have done absolutely nothing?

Before she could reflect calmly, as a sensible person, her feet are leading her to the store where she had seen Harold enter. It's early, too early for any store to be open, yet she finds herself climbing the stairs to the second floor. And when she sees a tuft of black hair over the counter her stomach wraps in protest. Instead of finding the person who was making her life difficult, she runs into an unknown girl.

"Good Morning. Can I help you?" The girl says with a smile.

Jane catches herself unaware of how to bring up Harold. Well, she came this far. Better be direct. "Does Harold work here?"

"Oh, um, I'm sorry. He was dismissed from the company last week."

Things are starting to make sense. Her instincts, which she acquired after years of detective's books and movies, sharpen. "Can you tell me the reason?"

The girl's expression already gives the answer, but Jane is prepared to insist. "I'm a friend and I'm not being able to get in touch with him."

The girl bites her lips and leans over the counter. "I really can't tell you this, so try not to spread it. Some girl made a complaint to our boss that Harold abused a total of 5 girls in the last few months. That's why he was fired."

 _What a disgusting man._ Jane thinks, gritting her teeth. Her main hypothesis was, since Jane was able to escape (in the night of the bar) before things got worse, Harold probably thought she was the one who made the accusation. Even more so with the suspicion that he actually saw her following him that day. Whoever pressed charges deserves congratulations!

"Thanks! Have a nice day." Jane says goodbye to the girl and heads to the campus.

The question is what the hell would she do? If he really is the vengeful type, he won't leave Jane alone with just a threat. But she couldn't keep stressing about this she had important classes to attend to, classes that required total concentration. Needless to say, all Jane could think of was that monster.

_Gosh, could this week get any worse?_

Roxy sends a text telling Jane that she’s waiting in the campus's parking lot, which leaves the girl intrigued; after all, they hadn’t made plans today. As Jane's class is over, she finds the blonde in her mother's car, listening to some bad pop from the 2000s.

"Hey Janey."

"You're not drunk, are you?" Jane says, getting into the passenger.

"Of course not! Its noon and I just got off work." Roxy gets annoyed at the suspicion, so much that Jane wishes she hadn't said anything. However, the girl soon changes the subject.

"Should we have lunch somewhere?" Jane arches her eyebrows, ready to protest and explain her lack of money, but Roxy interrupts her. "Don't worry, it's on me!"

Jane only accepts because she knew Roxy could be very insistent, she makes a mental note of baking something sweet involving pumpkins for Roxy as soon as she finds the time, and an oven.

"So," Roxy turns off the stereo. "I don't have very good news."

_God freaking damn it._

Jane bites her lip and waits for the worst.

"Mom wants to go to Switzerland in two days and she's demanding me to go along," Roxy glances at Jane and continuous. "I tried to talk to her, but she's complaining that we never spend time together and blah, blah, blah. Apparently she's finally feeling guilty for all these years of neglect."

"Anyway, it's only going to be for a week, maybe less." Roxy's expression is nothing but guilty, but Jane only smiles relieved.

"Roxy, don't even worry, I don't want to stop you from spending quality time with your mother. I'm sure Dirk and Jake won't mind me sleeping on their couch for a week. "

Roxy seems much more relieved, but the guilt was still on her face. Of all Jane's problems, this one was the smallest!

"Really! I'll be fine. Besides, it's a great excuse to spend some time with them and clear up this misunderstanding once and for all. "

"Yeah, about that," Suddenly the Roxy gets serious. "Just don't let those two take advantage of you."

"What do you mean? Until yesterday you were too happy about this weird thing we three are having."

"Yeah, but, tsk, it's just that you know how Dirk is manipulative and Jake has a hard time thinking about anyone other than himself."

Jane rolls her eyes; she really does not want to overthink this.

"Don't worry! I can deal with them."

___

 

"Thanks for letting me stay here."

"Don't even worry you head over this, Jane. But are you sure you want to stay on that ragged couch?" Jake says, trying to divide his attention between Jane and his phone.

"It's not like I have any other choice."

"There's the room Dirk works on."

"Yes, but doesn't he works there?" Jane smirks at Jake's disgruntled look.

"You could sleep with us, the bed is big enough." Jane turns abruptly toward the boy, and he laughs it off. "I'm joking." However, he avoids Jane's eyes and the smile on his lips is awkward.

She definitely needed to talk to those two and, even if it was something unpleasant, she promised herself she would. However, the two of them were acting as if nothing had happened, which only made things difficult for Jane. How would she talk to the two if they were pretending that everything was perfectly normal? Maybe she is seeing things that don't exist? Was she imagining all this? No! Even if it was something uncomfortable, she needed to do it. Now it was just a matter of waiting for the right moment.

"Hey, you okay?" Dirk stops right behind Jake, his hands dirty with grease.

"Yes, I'm good." She looks at the three (single) pieces of clothing in her hands. "As possible as I can be."

"Let me get you something to wear." Jake says, heading to the bedroom.

 "I don't think it will fit."

"Come on! I probably have something that will suit you. "

She sighs in dismay when he comes back with some shirts, shorts and underwear, which Jane refuses to think about touching any pair of underwear belonging to them. "Jake, I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm kind of big."

"Er…" The boy's face starts to blush.

"Hey, I'm sure most will. And this house rule is go commando any time!" Dirk shrugs and just imagining walking around without underwear leaves Jane extremely uncomfortable.

Only with that, the atmosphere between the three becomes heavy. Maybe now was a good time to have _the talk_ to them?

…

Are you going crazy? It's one of the worst possible times ever.

She takes the clothes from Jake's hands, leaving the undergarments aside. Luckily for Jane the two don't take too long to leave for the day. And, okay, maybe she's not 100% confident in dealing with them. But Jane knew Dirk and Jake for a long time, she was sure that everything would turn out just fine. Besides, although Roxy warned her to be careful with them, Jane wasn't too worried. After all what could they do to her? Jake was a complete dork and Dirk, well, Dirk was a bit manipulative, but Jane was far from being a man. She could see no reason to worry.

Even if the boys' couch isn't exactly comfortable for other things besides sitting down, she falls asleep fast. However, when she wakes up a slight pressure sets in her lower back and she can already tell that that week (and that couch) won't be gentle with her back.

Since her apartment was invaded Jane's state of vigilance doubled. She believed that a good part of women were always aware of their surroundings, after all there were always risks of sexual assaults on women since the beginning of time. But being constantly aware left the girl exhausted. As soon as she finishes her classes and sets foot at the boys' home, the weight of worry on her shoulders disappears, leaving only a sore and insistent pain in the place.

She peeps at Dirk at the workroom, as usual, and warns him of her arrival. At least she can cool her head by cooking something for the boy, and she needs to practice some recipes anyway.

There's something in the kitchen that calmed Jane. Maybe it is the focus on the preparation of the food, or maybe it is the methodical activities, or the fact that she always loved to eat. Was there anything more efficient to forget your problems than food? She doubted. Hence, she is so focused on her recipe that when she feels a presence behind her the knife escapes from her hand, almost falling in her feet.

"Gosh, Dirk. Don't do that." There's a tiny smirk on the boy's lips.

"Sup Guy Fieri, whatcha cooking?"

If looks could kill, Dirk would be dead on the ground. "I can't believe you called me that."

This time he laughs.

"Did you hear from him?" Dirk says.

 _Him?_ Oh!

"So I went to the place where he worked," She senses the boy's displeasure. "Calm down, he wasn't there. Apparently he was fired, someone reported him for abusing 5 girls in the last few months, can you believe it?"

Dirk leans against the counter beside her. "And what is your hypothesis, Detective Crocker?"

It brings a smile to Jane's lips. "He probably thinks I made the complaint. And, okay, maybe he actually saw me that day and followed me. My investigation skills are kind of rusty."

"You don't say."

She rolls her eyes. "Anyway, I'm still thinking about my next steps."

"There are no next steps; you will not go after that guy."

Dirk could be super annoying when he wanted to. It wasn't like Jane was planning to face him. She would only investigate, that's what she was, an investigator. Which was a lie, the only thing Jane could come by was as a gastronomy student and a bad drunk.

"I'm not going after him."

"Oh, really?" She feels the irony in his words.

She bites her tongue to avoid arguing with Dirk, who is more stubborn than a mule.

"Anyway, I'll figure it out." He continues.

"How?"

"Doing something I should have done from day one.”

"What are you going to do?" He doesn't respond, only walks away from the kitchen and from Jane. She isn't surprised by Dirk's attitude, but that doesn't stop her from getting annoyed.

"Dirk! Arg, for the love of God." She returns to her meal, stirring the ingredients way too harshly.

___

 

Jane's waffle is covered in chocolate syrup and ice cream. She promised herself she would stop eating sweets so late at night, but her week is not being exactly easy. In her defence, Jake came home with a huge ice cream tub, so she needed to make waffles.

"Then she told me that my shorts are too short! Can you believe it?" Jake has been sulking ever since he got home, he had been complaining about work non-stop, especially regarding certain colleague.

Jane diverts her attention from the computer and waffle, already wet from having absorbed the ice cream, and watches the argument in front of her. Dirk raises an eyebrow at Jake, doubting the boy, and Jake loses it.

"You're joking, right? You know very well that I wear shorts on a quite appropriate length, thank you very much sir." The boy's voice comes out loud and sharp, making Jane cringe.

"Hey boys, let's not fight." She says.

"We're not fighting." The pout on Jake's lips says otherwise. "Anyway, what are you doing over there?" He continues, a curious look trying to peek at the monitor.

"Hunting for cheap apartments in town."

"So soon?" Dirk says, without taking his eyes from his game.

"Huh. I already sent some resumes for part-time jobs. It's not a lot of money, but it's enough for me not to depend entirely on my father." Of all the opportunities, only 2 worked with confectionery, but beggars can’t be choosers. As long as it paid the bills, Jane wouldn’t complain.

"You can live with us." Jake says, staring at his bitten cuticles.

"Where would I stay? On your couch?" The mocking tone in her voice comes out accidentally, but neither of them cares.

"Hey, this apartment has two rooms" Jake says.

Jane glances at Dirk; he keeps silent. "Come on Jake, Dirk works there. I don't want to be a nuisance."

"Our bed is pretty big," Dirk says, and if he wasn’t wearing those shades, Jane could swear he was winking at her.

What are their deal? It is the second time in two days that one of them suggested sleeping in the same bed. Jane feels a tightness in her stomach that she shouldn't feel.

"Hoo, hoo." She forces a shaky laugh. "But seriously, I'd love to live with you two, or with Roxy, but I need to do this alone. I think it's time, you know? To be responsible and take care of myself, adult things, blah, blah, blah."

Luckily for Jane the boys quickly change subject, if that continued for much longer she would flush. That feeling wasn’t something Jane was used to. It isn't enough her having that damn unrequited love for Jake for all those years? Dirk had to get in this mess as well?

In this way, she decides to focus on her paper, seeing that all her data was lost. Dirk gave her his old computer, which was a thousand times better than her poor old one. She feels bad ignoring the boys, especially because she is a guest, but papers are not written by themselves and Jane has a long work ahead.

They both said goodbye around midnight. The dessert dishes on the living room table bother her deeply, so Jane decides to take care of it before continuing on with her long night of college work. Thank God she would only have classes tomorrow by night.

Jane is caught again by surprise, this time not so luckily, as the plates escape her hands and fall directly into the kitchen sink. One of them breaks.

"Dirk!" She whines.

"Sorry."        

"Um," She only imagines he wants to say something, which was hard to tell by the coldness on the boy's face. "Yes?"

"W-What are you doing?"

Excuse me? Is Dirk s _tuttering_? Jane couldn't be more confused.

"Washing the dishes? Don't worry, there isn't a lot and it was bothering me a bit. Go to sleep, I'll take care of it. "

Jane turns to the sink, but one of Dirk's hands holds her by the arm and turns her body toward him. He approaches and Jane's heart stops _. He's going to kiss me again_ , that's what she was convinced, but the boy only wraps his arms around her, squeezing her body against his.

It was the second time that Dirk was initiating physical contact on his own will. Maybe the boy finally considered Jane as someone to exchange affection with? But Jane could no longer convince herself of that, and it wasn't even because of what Roxy said, or rather, insinuated, Dirk's behaviour toward her was getting weirder and weirder. Not just Dirk's, but Jake's as well.

She tries not to let it upset her, and gently returns the hug.

"What's gotten into you recently?" It comes out of her mouth before she even realizes.

"I'm just trying to figure something out." He releases her.

Dirk avoids Jane's eyes at all costs and, before she could question him, he is already leaving the kitchen.

This has not been the first time, and Jane was still taken aback by these changes coming from Dirk. But for some reason it had been different. Call it intuition, but it seems that something had changed. She ignores her racing heart and the warmth of her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The good news is... I have the next chapter already translated, I just have to check some words with my blessed friend that is a english teacher. 
> 
> *So, as you might not know I'm brazilian, and since I write this originally in portuguese sometimes I don't know if some expressions are the same in english. A lot of them are. I try to search for it, but sometimes it can go unnoticed.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nsfw ahead, beware my dudes.
> 
>  
> 
> *Again. I'm sorry for any grammar mistake. Forgive me senpai.

Jane's intuition is at least excellent! She wakes up, early as usual and completely tired, cursing her body for not letting her sleep until late, and cooks breakfast for herself and Jake. The boy offers her a cheerful _'Good morning'_ , Jane doesn't have much enthusiasm in answering it, her tired eyes won't leave the coffee mug. Before the boy leaves for work, after a casual conversation in which Jane paid zero attention, he places a light kiss on her cheek. That woke her up. The surprise was undeniable on her face, but Jake only gives her an unusual smile.

She's too tired to care. So after a failed attempt to fall back asleep, she gives up and decides to take a shower. That feeling that something wasn’t quite right was still there, and it was hard not to overthink when you live together (temporarily) with the cause of your anguish. A knock at the door wakes Jane out of her thoughts.

"Hey, it's me," She says, even though it's obvious that it could only be her using the bathroom at that time.

"I know." The boy's voice is groggy with sleep. "I need to use the bathroom, like, right now."

Jane looks at herself, covered in foam and has just applied conditioner to her hair. "Can you not wait? I’ll finish in less than 5 minutes. "

"Nope, sorry." She hears the door handle open and; _what?_ _Is the door open?_ _What the hell, Jane?!_

"Dirk!" The boy simply walks in, the sound of urine rush startle her. She turns her body to the wall, choosing to expose her back, which was the best option. "I'm not a decent at all, couldn't you have waited?"

"You know I’m not good at aiming into bottles."

Jane sighs deeply, Dirk certainly heard. "Hey, I didn't see anything, don't get so worked up." And he leaves.

After finishing up, she finds him in the kitchen, nibbling on the rest of the breakfast. "I have to go to campus to finish my paper."

"Alright," He says, gazing at Jane, drying her hair with a towel. "Don't worry about dinner."

"Why not?"

"Don't you have night classes today?"

"Yeah, but..."

"Jake's bringing pizza."

It's not the healthiest option there is, but Jane isn't one of the healthiest person there is. She shrugs.

A large hand covers Jane's shoulder, squeezing lightly. "See ya."

___

 

When she arrives from college, extremely tired, both boys are already dining, sitting on the living room floor with a box of pizza in the middle of them. That seems to be the perfect situation to have _the talk_ with them, even upon sighting a few bottles of beer around.

She throws her bag in the room's corner and sits down. "Hiyah."

"Janeey." Jake is in a good mood, which was great sign! "Here." He handed her a bottle of beer. The last time she drank alcohol it didn't end up well, but a few sips wouldn't kill, right?

"So I wanted to talk to you guys."

"About what?" Jake says, naively.

Dang it! Everything was much easier when she went through the scene in her head, but in real life, Jane feels a little nervous.

"Well ..." She starts, but doesn’t finish. Jane is a well-prepared woman; she had everything she wanted to say in her head, but a wave of insecurity passes through her as she opens her mouth.

_Aren't you being over dramatic Jane?_

Impossible, right? Even Roxy saw that something was fishy!

_What if Roxy was wrong?_

But Jake said he was jealous and liked her! Even Dirk kissed her for no reason.

_Okay but! What if both of them deny it?_

"Jane?"

Gosh! If her heart beats any faster, she would have a heart attack.

 _No!_ It’s impossible; she just won't be able to have the talk. Yes, Jane is aware that she promised that she would no longer run away from her problems, but getting rid of old habits is harder than previously thought.

"About Harold. Dirk, what did you do to him?"

Now Jane feels like crap for chicken out.

"Oh, that guy." Dirk shrugs and takes a bite of his slice. "Hal hacked into his computer."

"That artificial intelligence of yours?"

"Yep. Let's just say that he is no longer a problem."

Jane rolled her eyes, she hated when he acted like that. Yeah, yeah, everyone knows you're a genius, Bill Gates. So stop with the mystery and get over it already. She doesn’t say any of that aloud, because, after all, Jane wouldn't take out her frustrations on the Strider. Although she is very close to doing it.

"What exactly did you do?"

"Threatened him and deleted all his files. I mean, Hal did. "

_Oh._

Either he would leave Jane alone once and for all, or he would be even angrier and take revenge on her. To tell you the truth Jane is not too worried.

"What if he comes after her?" Jake says; concern in his eyes.

"Nah, I checked all the information available on his computer. That guy's a coward. I'm 95% sure he won't bother you anymore."

"It's really unpleasant when you talk like Hal."

"We are the same person."

Oh boy, here we go again! Jane rolls her eyes, those two always argue when they are together. It was incredible, because the constant quarrels seemed not to bother either of them. On the contrary, they practically argued with a smile on their faces. Jane would never understand.

After two beers (yeah, Jane promised not to overdo it, but it was difficult to do so when she's so frustrated with herself), she starts to feel relaxed. The alcohol was a factor that helped, but Jake also had part in it. God, she feels guilty for teasing him, but it’s almost impossible not to do so when the boy is hollower than a block of wood.

"And today she dragged my Lara Croft shirt, which is not the first time she babbles about my shirts, the last time was because, apparently, it was too tight on me. Arg, I don't comprehend why she hates my person so much."

"Oh Jake, poor innocent Jake."

"I don't need you mocking me, Jane." He says, clearly irritated.

"Why is he like that? I don't understand."

"Maybe he's just _'innocent'_.'"

"I don't buy it."

"What?!"

Okay, now he's really annoyed.

"Can't you see?" Dirk looks indignant at the boy's innocence, probably because of the amount of drinks he manage to chug down in less than one hour. “She totally want to hit that, smash you, shaboinking you, get her pussy wet, she wants that big, thick, juice cock."

Jane starts to laugh so hard that a few tears escape her eyes. However, Jake is completely red in the face, which is cute to watch.

"Jeez Dirk, could you control your sailor's mouth? She certainly doesn't want to do anything in the matter with me."

"Jake," She says, wiping away her tears. "Don't you think it's strange that she always implicates with you? I mean, does she do this with anyone else?"

"Umm, I don't think so."

"Come on, I'll help you out!" Jane says, motivated. "Someone needs to teach you how to get over your hollow head." She takes a sip of her beer and ignores the _"Hey."_ that comes from the boy.

After 10 minutes of explanation, Jake is almost convinced that his co-worker has indeed an eye on him. It was no easy task, with each new point Jane tried to make, the boy denied. Which she scolded by pinching the boy's thigh with her toes.

"Tsk, okay, maybe she finds me attractive, after all I'm not an ugly lad, but I still find it difficult-" Jane pinches him again. "Jane for the love of God, if I don't think you're a polite and charming lady, but if you keep up with that I'll have to fight back."

Jane smiles from ear to ear and looks at Dirk. "I can't believe your boyfriend is threatening me."

Dirk drops his seventh bottle of beer with an unusual smile and holds Jane's arms behind her back. "I hold and you beat fuck out of her."

Uselessly Jane tries to free herself; Dirk is much stronger than the girl could ever be. Jake approaches her, and in the middle of the laughter, she puts one foot on his shoulder to keep him from getting closer. Still, Jake manages to reach Jane's waist and showers her with tickles.

That's not fun at all for Jane. She struggles to breathe between the laughter and Jake only stops when tears come out of her eyes. With difficulty, she takes a deep breath. "Jesus, don't do that again." Again, she tries to break free, but Dirk's grip hasn't loosen a bit.

_What? Why?_

In the middle of the tickling torture, Jane didn't notice that Jake came closer. Only when he holds her face in both hands, Jane realises that she is in a tricky situation. She forced a laugh, feeling her face heat up. "What?"

With his thumb, he spreads the wetness of her face. "Nothing. Is just," He looks in Dirk's direction, who is still behind Jane, holding her tight. "You're really pretty."

She suppose she saw it coming, maybe that`s why when Jake kisses her, she kissed him back. For the love of god, she is not even drunk, but she feels desperate for Jake's touch. A muffled moan that escapes her mouth.

She needs to touch him, but her hands are still pin behind her back. Jane tries break away again, however Dirk continues to hold her tightly. Another muffled moan comes out of her mouth as she feels Dirk's cold nose on her nape. It's exactly like last time, but now Jane doesn't know if she'll have enough will to run away (or if she even wants to).

Dirk finally lets her go. Immediately her hands go to Jake's arms, pulling him closer. He releases her to catch his breath. Suddenly looking at Jake, lips now swollen and red, is too much for Jane. She tries to bury her face in his shoulder, which doesn't really work due to her glasses. She pulls them off, throws it in the couch and turns her face to the boy's warm shoulder.

Jane hears Dirk moving behind her, and the wet sound of kisses above her head. It`s too intense; the guilt building inside her is suddenly too much, just like last time.

Jake pulls away, and one hand holds her jaw, pulling her head to the side. Dirk is quick to kiss her. Much more invasive than the last time, she can barely breathe with the intensity of the boy's tongue demanding hers.

Two hands hold her by the waist and she feels a warm breath on her cheek. "Is it okay to keep going?"

 _Keep going?_ Are they really thinking of going all the way? Jane feels the anxiety in the bottom of her stomach. She is not sure if she wants to do something so intimate with both of them. Because she knew that if they go all the way everything would change.

"Let her talk, Dirk."

He moves away, she can see the fade orange iris behind the dark lenses. Jane should say something, she just can't think of what, or where to start.

"I don't. Maybe it's-"

"Please," Dirk whispers, she can't take her eyes off him. "Jane."

"Dirk!" Jake scolds him.

Does she really want to run away?

"Okay." If she wasn't sure before, now it is certain that she would regret this.

Jane swears seeing a tiny smile on Dirk's face before he's back kissing her, much more smoothly. Discovering that she really likes this side of Dirk, the boy's hand touches her cheek softly and his mouth moves slowly with hers.

Jake's warm nose is on her neck and she contains a shiver. "Is that all right?" He's being strangely careful about this, making her heart skip a beat.

"It's all right. I am fine!"

“Fuck yes.” Jake says in an excited groan. The boy's hands go to her breasts, holding them carefully. She laughs against Dirk's mouth.

"You can squeeze them." Jake's face darkens, this time out of shame. He buries his face in her breasts and she laughs even more.

"Okay, let's take this party to the bedroom."

Oh, wow! She can feel how serious this decision is. If you think going to the gynaecologist is uncomfortable, try to join in a threesome with your two best friends.

When they enter the room, Jane rubs the palms of her hands on the front of her jeans, containing the nervousness (and wiping the sweat from her hands). But the other two didn't appear to be nervous at all.

As naturally as if they did that kind of thing every day (which was probably true), Dirk takes Jake's glasses off, placing it carefully on the nightstand, followed by his shirt.

Dirk gives Jake a quick kiss before turning him toward Jane. "Help me?"

She can barely stand those green eyes on her. Her trembling hands go up to the boy's shorts, and she doesn't really want him to notice how nervous she actually is, so once again she brings her face to the boy's shoulder. Jake's skin is almost as warm as her mouth, he shudders as soon as Jane's mouth touches his neck. She notices Jake rubbing against Dirk.

His shorts hits the ground and, _God_ , okay, she always imagined Jake to be big, but not like that. He is hard against the material of his underwear. Jane can not take her eyes off him.

Jane hears a hickey being laid on Jake's nape. "Why am I the only nude here?"

"How are we going to do this?" Dirk says, she isn't sure if the question was to her.

"I have no idea." Jane alternates her gaze between Dirk and Jake's underwear. Clearly, she isn't in a position to take any dominant role.

"I don't think we have condoms in the house." _Jesus_ , Dirk's hand slides into the waistband of Jake's underwear. Jane needs a fan right in her face.

"N-No problem? I don't care."

"Don't care? Are you just going to look then?" When her eyes leaves the events in Jake's underwear to look at Dirk, she sees a grin on his lips.

"Um ..." What did he want her to say? _'Yes, please?'_ Because, believe it, it`s exactly what she would say.

Jane can see the head of Jake's cock and Dirk jerking him with slow movements. One of Jake's hands grips his wrist, she wasn`t sure if it was to make him go faster or make him stop.

“Alright, let’s just fool around then."

Dirk slides Jake's underwear down his thick thighs, yep, he is big. Gosh, Jane, control yourself. How long had she seen someone naked? (A very long time). "Again. Why am I the only one naked?" Jake brings both hands to covers his genitals.

Well, it's not like she's going to give up now. Jane pulls her shirt over her head, throwing it in some corner. She avoids looking in their direction.

When she finally manages to get the tight jeans off her legs, she decides to peek over them and, dammit, they are watching at her.

"Um, well, that's embarrassing." She gives the most uncomfortable laugh of the night and look at her feet.

"Hey Janey," Jake takes a step and stands facing her. "Look on the bright side, you're still wearing something. I'm completely naked. "

She chuckles lightly. Jake brings his arms around her, going straight to the bra's hook. After two sad tries, she unhooks it herself. Jane couldn't avoid grinning at Jake's embarrassed expression. Her heavy boobs fall, exposed, and he glazes upon them.

"Oh, wow."

_Wow? Is he serious?_

Distracted, she jumps when feeling Dirk behind her. "Nice Jake, really sexy! Her panties are dripping with all this smoothness."

Another laugh comes out of her; she leans back against Dirk's chest. _Shit_ , she was really going to regret this in the morning.

"Oh, shut it." His palms come upon her ribs, his thumbs tracing patterns on her skin.

"You can touch me."

Jake bite his lips, carefully cupping her breasts. Behind her Dirk leans his pelvis against her ass. _Yep_ , that was definitely an erection, hoo hoo.

It was time to get her hands dirty. She brings her hand to Jake's cock, which twitches on her fingers. He buries his face on the crook of her neck, moaning quietly. And if that isn't enough to make all her blood go to her head (and other places), Dirk grinding against her ass is doing the trick.

Her panties are suddenly pulled down, cringing feeling her own wetness dripping onto her thighs. She turns towards Dirks, just to check if he's somewhat comfortable touching her. He kissed her, deeply. She decides to trust him, at least to stop things if he gets uncomfortable.

The kisses stop in her jaw, and he whispers in her ear. "We should suck him off, both of us."

Fuck. His voice was so fucking hoarse. "Yes! Yeah, totally agree."

Slowly she pushes Jake until the edge of the bed. Dirk behind her, guiding both of them. Jake falls, supporting himself with his elbows. He grunts, nibbling his already swollen lips upon seeing both of them on their knees.

She isn't that confident to take the first step and actually put him in her mouth, but with Dirk there certainly makes her less anxious. He finally takes off his shades. Jane could count down in her fingers how many times she saw his eyes. They’re gorgeous. He holds Jake's cock by the base, glaring shamelessly at Jane.

 _Shit,_ it's really thick. Her jaw clicks when she takes him on her mouth. Jake is unbelievably hot, musky, so incredible like Jake she feels her panties soaking. A hot breath hits her face, Dirk's nose brushes against her cheeks while his mouth sucks the places where she couldn't reach.

Jake seems like in paradise. And God, how loud the boy is! It's a medley of moans and cries, which only made her hornier. Without thinking her nails pierce against the skin of his thigh, he draws a hand to her hair, grasping bluntly. By Jane's side, Jake is holding the blonde's hair even more fiercely.

When the pain on her jaw was too much she withdraws, so Dirk takes her place. She watches stunned as he swallows all of Jake's cock, almost gagging, orange eyes watering.

“Oh fuck.” Jake cries.

His thighs tense under Jane's palm as he cums on the deep of Dirk's throat. Both boys look at each other so intensely, intimately. She feels awkward, however couldn't avert her eyes. Dirk throws his body across Jake, devouring the boy's mouth. It would be even more awkward if she stayed there on her knees staring at them. So she craws beside both of them. There's a thin layer of sweat covering Dirk's back; even so she places her lips on his skin. He tenses by her touch.

Dirk meets her lips, but he doesn't touch her, which she really didn't expect him to do. In this kind of situation, the regret was present in the pit of her stomach.

There's a dark wet spot in front of Dirk's underwear. Jake pulls it, releasing his hardness. Jake's hoarse voice whispers, "OH boy, this looks painful." A mischievous smile opens up on his lips. He traces a finger across the head.

"Don't tease."

“Should I return the favour?”

She never saw such lewd look in his eyes. For the first time Dirk vocalize a groan, while Jake goes down ever so slowly on the blonde's torso, never breaking eye contact. _Christ!_ Jane press her tights together.

Watching him tease Dirk's dick with his tongue, licking up the head, Dirk sighs loudly. Completely mesmerized, Jane could only squirm her feet and swallow a moan. He sucks at the tip of Dirk's dick. The green eyes focused on Dirk suddenly gazes at her.

"I got an idea. This is going to be a treat." He whispers to himself.

He lays her down, sitting on top of hers and Dirk's thighs. A calloused hand strokes at her groin. Her body trembles.

"You don't need to." She stops his hand.

"Please, let me repay you."

Leaning on her elbows she watched he go down on her. Her pussy already burning with expectation.

When feeling those soft lips on her clit she throws her head back in pleasure. He went so slowly, exactly how she liked to be touched. And it was him, it was Jake between her tights. Jane thinks she's going to go insane.

"O-oh goodness, what are you doing to me?"

Suddenly she hear Dirk's voice beside her. "It's called being a fucking tease, like he always is." Completely involved on what was happening.

Jake laughs between her legs, leaning away and taking his lips back to Dirk, fondling her with his fingers.

He keeps taking turns on them for quite some time. A really long time. So much it was almost like a torture session. She tries to touch herself, only to have her hand slapped away by Jake

Dirk cums first with Jake swallowing him. Now she has all of his attention. His tongue circle her clitoris nonstop, torturously slow, until she finally have her orgasm. A very painful one. Dirk kisses her while her body spasms, devouring her moans.

When her body comes to a rest Jake is already lying by her side, sandwiching her between him and Dirk. He rests his forehead on her shoulder, smiling softly.

Something pokes Jane's thigh. "Er, do you want help with that?"

Jake takes a while to understand what she means. "God no! I'm freaking exhausted. It'll go away."

Dirk holds her by the waist, hiding his face on her neck. And she is stuck. But there’s no problem, even with the uncomfortable wetness between her legs; she's too tired to leave the comfort and warm of the bed (and those two).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I never cringed so much writing a smut in my life. I like to think about it, but writing it physically hurts me.
> 
> The next chapter is already done (but not translated unfortunately). So... see you when it's done :)

**Author's Note:**

> You have no idea I edited this so many times and I’m still really insecure, aaarg. I'm doing this not only because the fandom is much more alive in this language but because I wanna practice my english!
> 
> Also I love these rare ships, bury me in them I'll die happy.  
> Shoot my heart with the angst. My kink is suffering.


End file.
